Kingdom of Gladiators tells the story of a king who makes a pact with a demon, and then has a gladiator tournament, and these two things are somehow connected. Steer clear if you can, this tits-and-hits action film offers a very poor show of both the former and the latter.

What is it with horribly titled British films lately? First Swinging With the Finkels, now this? C’mon people, just name your film after a dinosaur, there’s loads of them left. It’d be much easier to sell a dark comedy set in a Scottish brothel (apparently they’re legal up there, fancy that!) if it was called Tyrannosaurus Sex. Just sayin. Luckily though, Spanking in Paradise is infinitely better than its dreadful title, a witty, surprisingly restrained and thoroughly Scottish gem.

Well, not scientifically speaking, unless you’re a lizard. But it will once this snow-lovin’ yeti gets his axe into you. Yep, they can use tools now. Power of evolution.

When China Met Africa is a indepth documentary about China’s economic foray into Africa in 2006. Described as a “rare, grass-roots view into one of the most important economic challenges of our age” by The Times, it’s just as exciting as it sounds.

Natalie Portman’s shiny new Academy Award is going to reflect an awful lot of spotlights on her over the next few years. This should be fine, of course, but it’s not ideal when the project currently in the post-Oscar glare is a distinctly average drama which she made before Black Swan and which has only just crept onto DVD. The only impossibility in Love and Other Impossible Pursuits is enjoying it.

“Blood Out” – Mexican Mafia Motto: To blood out is a requirement to leave a gang. To join, “blood in”, you must kill someone. The only way to leave, “blood out”, is to be killed yourself.
For a film that opened with crack, tits and hip-hop Blood Out was more than a little disappointing.

The fly on the wall documentary American Harmony delves into the obsessive world of modern barbershop quartets; where fast-food managers moonlight as minor celebrities and grown men serenade french fries (well, it is America).

Upon its release in 1972, On Any Sunday, a low-budget documentary about the lives of motorcycle racers, immediately generated interest (perhaps largely due to the participation of Steve McQueen) and was nominated for the Academy Award for Best Documentary. Now due to be re-released on DVD on the 12th of September, it’s our job to see how the documentary stands up against the test of time. And also Steve McQueen is in it. Did we mention Steve McQueen is in it?

This is, according to the handy subtitle, Henry Jaglom’s “very serious comedy about women and food”. Except it’s not; in fact, the term ‘comedy’ has never been so grossly misused. Quite honestly, it’s an utterly depressing commentary on eating disorders. Which is perfect for those looking for some sort of diet companion DVD…

A decade after the initial Spy Kids movie, here we have some new tricks on a very old dog. Spy Kids: All The Time in the World has not only jumped on the 3D bandwagon, but has also taken a stab at innovation. It’s employed the use of scratch-n-sniff cards. While they may not smelll like what they’re supposed to, they’re at least a refreshing distraction to what’s happening on screen. Don’t risk taking a whiff.