Friday Drinking Game #72 – Samuel L Jackson
With the release of Django Unchained and the excitement surrounding The Avengers 2, and the fact that everyone loves Samuel L, we have a compiled a list of reasons why you should toast Samuel L in all his motherfucking glory.
Take a sip:
Every time Samuel L Jackson stars in a Tarantino film.
Get some new friends, bro.
Every time Samuel says motherfucker.
Lol, classic Sam.
Every time Samuel gets the best line in the film.
“Say WHAT again! SAY WHAT AGAIN!” “What country you from? What ain’t no country I ever heard of. Do they speak English in What? .. ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER DO YOU SPEAK IT” “Hold onto your butts!” “Great… snakes on crack.” “Oh oh, you ready to blow? Well I’m a mushroom cloud-laying motherfucker, motherfucker. Everytime my hands touch brain I’m super fly TNT. I’m the guns of the Navarone!” (what does any of this even mean?). Basically this was your night’s entertainment, but if that’s not enough, carry on…
Take TWO sips:
Every time Samuel wears a stupid hat.
Be it a beanie, a cap, a sleeping hat, a bandana, an afro, a santa hat, something weird and leathery, a beret… this guy does not like his head. And so we’re here to celebrate his insecurites with a tasty beverage (see what we did there?). He even wears hats in interviews. What the? The more stupid the hat, the bigger the gulp.
Every time Samuel dies in a badass way.
Revenge of the Sith. Jurassic Park. Deep Blue Sea. Take your pick, then take two sips.
Every time Samuel L narrates or films take advantage of his voice.
He narrates Inglourious Basterds and doesn’t even appear in it. I mean, how bloody out of order. He also narrates Farce of the Penguins (did anyone even see this?) – so if you happen to be watching any of these films we’d like you to drink throughout the entire film, even if he’s not narrating. Actually, any time you hear his voice, even if it’s just in your head, down your drink.
Take THREE sips:
Every time Samuel eats a tasty burger.
Or discusses burgers. In fact, everytime he talks about or eats food, just drink.
Every time Samuel puts someone in their place with a biblical passage or says something inspirational.
You’ll be dead by the end of Coach Carter. There is no other human as cool and wise as ol’ Samuel, apart from Gandalf. And he’s a wizard. This again confirms our suspicions of wizardry. So fill up your glasses ’cause this shit’s about to real MOTHERFUCKER! Yeah we’re taking this whole Samuel L thing way too seriously.
Every time a shark interrupts Samuel while he’s saying something inspirational.
This one doesn’t happen that often, but how else do you kill off Samuel L in style? AND he dies after an inspirational speech, or should we say, midway through. Double whammy yo! Double those 3 sips!
DOWN IT MOTHERFUCKER:
Every time Samuel’s had enough of these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane.
Enough said. It’s time to open some fucking windows.