Orange (Wednesday)s and Lemons
Orange (Wednesday)s and Lemons
After one hundred and eleven weeks (plus all the ones we forgot) of defending your right to just have someone tell you what films to see on a Wednesday, the OWLs are in great peril. Will we be back next week? Nobody knows, not even Anthony Hopkins – and that guy is wise, man. Seriously. So for now, dive into what might well be your last ever complimentary paddling pool of citrus and cynicism. Parting is such sweet sorrow…
Spring finally seems to be here for good, so as you prepare that first celebratory vat of Pimm’s don’t forget to hold back a few oranges and lemons for this week’s film rundown. Will you be tempted by Ryan Gosling in a forest, or does Charlie Sheen boffing Lindsay Lohan sound more like your cup of tea? If it does, probably sterilise the cup before you let anyone else drink from it. Pervert.
Planning on heading to you local cinema tonight? Will you be using your joyous 2-for-1 ticket to see Oblivion, Spring Breakers, The Host (who ARE you?!) or something completely different? There’s just so very many choices – it’s too much for one small human being to figure out by themselves. Luckily for YOU, there’s a team of tame film reviewers on standby – and they can’t WAIT to forcefeed you their opinions…
As the year slows down and the sun is slowly beaten back by the forces of darkness, Best For Film is forced to rejuvenate its ranks week on week in a desperate attempt to keep the flame of reason burning in EC2. Who will arrive this week to reinforce us with cinematic quips and Luke Goss anecdotes? It’s a secret (not really, it’s Florrie)…
The rain notwithstanding, things are a bit dry at your local gigaplex this week. Fortunately, our squad of stalwart cinewarriors is on hand once more to shepherd you past the leering embrace of Adam Sandler’s henchmen and into safer, Affleckier waters. Just remember – if Kevin James had made Daredevil it probably would have been the highlight of his career.
Star Wars fever has simmered down, and your normal OWL service resumes in a week filled with Masters and Sapphires, whales and chatlines, and of course Ben Affleck running around Iran pretending to be George Lucas. But what should you spend your precious Orange Wednesday ticket on? Don’t ask Obama – he’s busy today – check with us instead.
Jesus, have we really done this ninety times? With just days to go before Skyfall hits our screens (and another week until payday) you may be saving your pennies for a Bond fix at the weekend, but our ceaseless quest to inform the mid-week cinemagoing of the population at large cannot be slowed by such trivial concerns. Plus, we have NEW writers! Hurrah!
After an all-too-long absence, the weary defenders are once more hauling themselves to the turrets and parapets of Best For Film Towers to boom their cinematic advice across the snowy wastes of Internet. What will you be seeing this week – the whimsical horror-themed animation, or the other whimsical horror-themed animation? Or ParaNorman?