Orange (Wednesday)s and Lemons
Orange (Wednesday)s and Lemons
After one hundred and eleven weeks (plus all the ones we forgot) of defending your right to just have someone tell you what films to see on a Wednesday, the OWLs are in great peril. Will we be back next week? Nobody knows, not even Anthony Hopkins – and that guy is wise, man. Seriously. So for now, dive into what might well be your last ever complimentary paddling pool of citrus and cynicism. Parting is such sweet sorrow…
Spring finally seems to be here for good, so as you prepare that first celebratory vat of Pimm’s don’t forget to hold back a few oranges and lemons for this week’s film rundown. Will you be tempted by Ryan Gosling in a forest, or does Charlie Sheen boffing Lindsay Lohan sound more like your cup of tea? If it does, probably sterilise the cup before you let anyone else drink from it. Pervert.
Planning on heading to you local cinema tonight? Will you be using your joyous 2-for-1 ticket to see Oblivion, Spring Breakers, The Host (who ARE you?!) or something completely different? There’s just so very many choices – it’s too much for one small human being to figure out by themselves. Luckily for YOU, there’s a team of tame film reviewers on standby – and they can’t WAIT to forcefeed you their opinions…
As another Best For Film internship reaches its close, our once-stalwart defenders ready their packs and prepare to demob. Do you think you have what it takes to man the ramparts against the endless torrent of crap films and even worse journalism infesting the Western world? Apply for our BRILLIANT internship here, but for now enjoy our pick of the week’s films:
It’s finally happened – Hollywood has run out of ideas. The blockbuster schedule is looking dead this week (at least until Brave and The Bourne Legacy make an appearance on Monday), and Best For Film Towers is accepting foreign aid to get them through the difficult times. Juice your 橙s and 柠檬s (oh yeah, we’re getting our Chinese on) and let’s faire cette chose!
Olympic fever has hit Best For Film Towers! HA, joke. We’ll be ignoring the stupid bloody sports as usual and sticking to our nice sitty-downy films, and if you don’t join us we’ll know you were the sort of twonk who used to look forward to PE lessons and not even consider sneaking off to smoke behind the bike sheds. You are not welcome here, Healthy Ones – you don’t even need a dose of citrus to guard against scurvy. Begone.
The wait is finally over! Time to get out your carefully stitched replica Batsuits and head to the cinema – that’s right, wear a constricting black outfit and sit in a massive dark windowless room with hundreds of sweaty geeks, on the hottest day of the year. Yay for slightly cheaper cinema tickets! Do… do any of you think that maybe being a film fan isn’t very healthy?
Another week, another batch of half-baked opinions from the cheery Best For Film team. How are you going to fill your last Orange Wednesday before B-Day finally hits on Friday? We’ve got literally ones of opinions for you to thieve and pass off as your own, and they’re citrus-themed!