This list wasn’t going to focus on child stars, but we realised that growing up in the public eye would be the ideal apprenticeship for being a circus star who has his life torn to pieces and subsequently moves into the Batcave, basically the world’s most homoerotic underground police station. Come at us, Haley Joel Osmont.

#5 – Thomas Brodie-Sangster

It’s not all been gravy for Thomas Brodie-Sangster since the glory days of getting cuddled by Liam Neeson in Love Actually. In the years that followed, he made the ghastly The Last Legion (please, Colin, never do action again), wore a baffling wicker top hat in Bright Star and started a band with his mum. But now, aged 23 (we KNOW, it’s mental), Tom has clawed his way out of the oubliette of film history with a role in Game of Thrones and a sharp, expressive mouth that would clearly look great peeking out from under a mask. We’re all pretending Nowhere Boy didn’t happen, TBS – it’s your time to shine.

#4 – Kieran Culkin

Although you’ll probably remember him as Kevin’s manky cousin Fuller in Home Alone, Kieran Culkin has spent the past twenty years quietly distancing himself from his brother’s reputation as a small, blonde, screaming repository for Michael Jackson’s confused semen. He was the best thing about Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, we’re happy to pretend he didn’t do Movie 43 – and if he’s in disguise it’ll stop people saying “Hey, you kinda look like Richie Rich!”

#3 – Robert Pattinson

Hear us out. R-Pattz isn’t a bad actor, he just makes crap films all the time – maybe the combination of grittiness and hyperreality that will obviously define The SuperBat Chronicles will be just what he needs to sort himself out and become more than Kristen Stewart’s discarded cock. Actually, this goes for most of the Harry Potter alumni. Tom Felton would make a good Nightwing, although nobody’s ever going to take him seriously as a goody ever again. And what about Rupert Grint? He’s done nothing but get stoned in his ice cream van for two years now, it’d be good for him to have a reason to leave the house.

#2 – Anton Yelchin

With supporting roles in the new Star Trek series and Jim Jarmusch’s Only Lovers Left Alive, Yelchin doesn’t really need our help. But with his legit Russian background, DC could steal a march on Marvel (who have cast Sebastian Stan, a man about as Russian as Adam Sandler is talented, as the Winter Soldier), charming the huge Russian movie market while snapping up a cracking actor into the bargain. And anyway, Nightwing is famously acrobatic – surely growing up with famous figure skaters as parents has left Yelchin with some residual bendiness?

#1 – Neil Patrick Harris

If you don’t want to see NPH swoop into the frame in a wingsuit and then trade quips with Batman, we don’t even want you on our site any more. Go on, piss off.

While we’re writing, we just want to remind Hollywood how much Mara Wilson needs to be cast as Harley Quinn. We’re amazed it’s taken you this long, guys.