# 10 Orgazmo (1997)

Popculture-porn just wouldn’t be credible without the degenerate contribution of Trey Parker and Matt Stone. The Southpark creators’ trademark absurd obscenity makes the perfect bedpartner for this story of Mormon missionaries and sex-superheros wielding Orgazmorators. ‘Nuff said.

# 9 Rated X (2000)

The tiger-blood imbibing, head-exploding human amphetamine that is the Sheen-machine teams up with his real life brother Emilio Estevez to play the brothers Jim and Artie Mitchell, who helped spread the good word of porn across Middle America. Their pilgrimage sees them through the highs of financing some of the earliest porno theatres in the US, to inciting nation-wide public outcry and engorging themselves on sex, booze and sibling rivalry. This film masquerades as an attempt to uncover the seedy world of the porn industry – circa late 1970s, but we can’t help but feel that we’re really just watching Charlie Sheen play Charlie Sheen.

# 8 Elektra Luxx (2010)

Pregnant porn-star Elektra Luxx (Carla Gugino) is trying to make an honest living teaching sex classes to housewives. But her attempt at leading a life of virtue is threatened when a figure from her past approaches her for a favour, instigating a series of events that will see Luxx having to face up to motherhood, existentialism, and the Virgin Mary. In short, Elektra Luxx is one heart-warming story of piety and pornography.

# 7 Finding Bliss (2009)

This film is somewhat unexpected, because up until its release, we assumed Leelee Sobieski was asexual. As a struggling filmmaker who takes a job at a big-league porn studio, prudish Jody (Sobieski) finds herself being more titillated than turned off by her provocative work environment. The script is as painful as Sobieski’s simulated sex scenes, but Jamie Kennedy both dashes and comes to the rescue with the most obscenely awesome name ever: Dick Harder.

# 6 Wonderland (2003)

This neo-noir biopic sees The Saint-turned-Whale Man Val Kilmer as the real life porn-king John Holmes, a.k.a. Johnny Wadd, a veritable sexathon legend in the late 70s. Wad reputably appeared in over 2500 films and was allegedly endowed with an enormous talent that would make Kilmer’s sea-friends weep salty tears of shame.

# 5 Inside Deep Throat (2005)

The staidly entitled Inside Deep Throat is punted as an, erm, penetrative documentary into the golden age of celluloid sexploits when STDs were virtually unknown and the clap was merely laudatory. The docudrama features a plethora of interviewees, including porn pioneer Larry Flynt and renowned profligate/sexpert Dennis Hopper.

# 4 The Girl Next Door (2004)

Essentially, The Girl Next Door is a teen comedy looking for an excuse to fulfil the ultimate soggy dream of its target demographic. Elisha Cuthbert plays the customary porn starlet, who captures the heart (amongst other things) of a straight-laced student, Eli (Emile Hirsch). Interestingly, the film is supposedly based on the real-life copulative capers of torture porn pundit Eli Roth (who reportedly dated a porn star in his pubescent years).

# 3 The People vs Larry Flynt

Directed by Milos Forman (who won a Best Director Oscar for the film), The People vs Larry Flynt details the rise of the eponymous skin mag publisher and editor, Larry Flynt (played by Woody Harrelson), and his subsequent clash with the law. This idealised take on Flynt’s defending of the porn-faith will no doubt compel each Hustler fan the world over to lift his free hand in salutational gratitude.

# 2 Zack and Miri Make a Porno

A classic love story of life imitating porn, where boy meets girl, establishes lifelong friendship, and then convinces said girl to create some wholesome, all-American smut together. Roommates Zack (Seth Rogen) and Miri (Elizabeth Banks) are low on cash and desperate to make their respective ends meet. In a moment of climatic inspiration, the pair attempt to tap into the lucrative industry of porn movies. As the cameras roll, however, Zack and Miri begin to sense that they may be feeling more than just each other. Perhaps the best thing about this film is the title of the imaginary porno, inspired by the coffee house in which they shoot the good stuff – Swallow My Cockucinno.

# 1 Boogie Nights

Boogie Nights is an epic journey beneath the undergarments of rich America, and the porn that financed its affluence. The story is visually and conceptually engulfing, and the film stars a sparkling cast of both pseudo and bona fide sleazists, including Mark Wahlberg (who plays the lead, Dirk Diggler), Heather Graham and Burt Reynolds. The real star of the film, however, is Dirk Diggler’s wiggler, whose 13-inch grounding in actual reality remains ambiguous to this day. While the actual plot was superseded by the legend it sired of Marky Mark’s mythically proportioned member, Boogie Nights remained strikingly impressive. Almost as much as the cyclopean trouser-snake.

Pulp Rewind?

Cast as a renegade US operative with a twitchy trigger finger, the Oscar nominated star of Saturday Night Fever and Pulp Fiction is the one member of cast to treat Adi Hasak‘s script with the disdain it deserves. And, in a cute nod to former glories, his remarkably athletic agent also gets to share his love of the local gastronomic delights. “Here, the locals call my vice a Royale with cheese”; he grins, barely resisting an urge to wink playfully at the camera. Government agent James Reese (Meyers) is desperate to impress the powers that be, and graduate from his current position as an ambassadorial aide. He gets his chance when he is asked to help Charlie Wax (Travolta) pass through Parisian customs and complete his secret anti-terrorism peace mission. Unexpectedly partnered with a fast-talking stranger who turns out to be a gun-toting lunatic, James struggles to understand what his role in the mission might be as Charlie shoots anyone and everyone in his path. In the process, James acquires a vase full of cocaine and an incredibly tall tale to impart to his doting, (and extremely dull) seamstress girlfriend, Carolina (Kasia Smutniak).

Good Cop/Bad Cop? Dull Cop/Mad Cop.

From Paris With Love is nonsense from lacklustre start to pyrotechnic laden finish, hinging weakly on the non-existent chemistry between the two male leads. Buddy movies demand sharp comic timing, and a clearly defined narrative arc for the characters from distrust and irritation to mutual admiration. Morel’s film has none of these qualities, leaving Travolta to blast each location to smithereens as a spectacularly wooden Rhys Meyers pouts in the background. The younger man fails to kindle a single spark of sexual attraction to Smutniak, and his pivotal scene, a heartfelt monologue about the power of love, is utterly excruciating. Our French farewell to James and Charlie cannot come soon enough. Mon Dieu.

Special Features

* Audio Commentary With Director Pierre Morel
* The Making Of From Paris With Love
* Spies, Spooks And Special Ops
* Secrets Of Spy Craft: Inside The International Spy Museum
* Theatrical Trailer

Sacha Baron Cohen (of Ali G, Borat and Bruno fame) and actress Isla Fisher (of Wedding Crashers, Confessions Of A Shopaholic)have announced that they wed last Monday in a small ceremony in Paris. The couple have been together a goodly while now (try engaged for six years), with Isla even converting to Judaism in 2007 for the eclectic funnyman after studying for three years. They have a two year old daughter, and felt it was time to finally tie the knot.

Aww, bless them. We just hope the Hollywood curse doesn’t claim anymore victims. Good luck guys, we’ve got out fingers crossed for you!

Our Kind of Teaching…

This is a very clever film for a number of reasons.  Firstly, the performances are universally flawless. Carey Mulligan plays the lead, Jenny, a girl whose ‘Oxford University’ future has been mapped out from birth by her parents and teachers.  Though her eyes are set on her A -Levels, the rest of her has always been tempted by the (apparent) evils of French music, cigarettes and a life of romance.

When Jenny meets David (a charismatic and wonderfully underplayed Peter Sarsgaard), an entirely different world of passion, art and excess is opened for her. She suddenly finds herself caught up in the very world she has always dreamt of, and nothing she has left behind seems important by comparison. Mulligan’s performance is glorious, managing to encapsulate both young girl and developing woman with a charm and innocent warmth that is wonderful to see.

Get Swept Up

Hornby’s writing, combined with the talent of Sarsgaard and Mulligan, mean that we too can’t help but get caught up in the world David presents us with, however inappropriate it seems at the outset. What could have come off as creepy seems only awkwardly romantic, the morality questions of their entanglement hang in the air but never crash down on the performances. The supporting cast includes Alfred Molina and Cara Seymour as Jenny’s disapproving but naive parents, and a sleek Dominic Cooper and Rosamund Pike as David’s exotic and oh so seductive friends. All deserve just as much praise as the leads for their honest and brilliantly funny performances.

Echoes Of Others

The story itself is not original; it has echoes of films like Educating Rita and The Great Gatsby. However, this is not to say it is not a thoroughly entertaining ride, for it is. It helps that the film is also beautifully shot, sumptuous to look at and makes you sigh with the strange desire to join the two lovers in their illicit world of luxury.

If you’re looking for a love tryst with a difference, An Education is for you. It’s sharp, funny, beautifully observed and packs enough of an emotional punch to have you asking a few questions of your own by the end. Film makers everywhere, take note; this is how you make a Rom-com. An education indeed.

Special Features

Deleted Scenes
Alternate Ending
Interviews with Cast

Pulp Rewind?

Cast as a renegade US operative with a twitchy trigger finger, the Oscar nominated star of Saturday Night Fever and Pulp Fiction is the one member of cast to treat Adi Hasak‘s script with the disdain it deserves. And, in a cute nod to former glories, his remarkably athletic agent also gets to share his love of the local gastronomic delights. “Here, the locals call my vice a Royale with cheese”; he grins, barely resisting an urge to wink playfully at the camera. Government agent James Reese (Meyers) is desperate to impress the powers that be, and graduate from his current position as an ambassadorial aide. He gets his chance when he is asked to help Charlie Wax (Travolta) pass through Parisian customs and complete his secret anti-terrorism peace mission. Unexpectedly partnered with a fast-talking stranger who turns out to be a gun-toting lunatic, James struggles to understand what his role in the mission might be as Charlie shoots anyone and everyone in his path. In the process, James acquires a vase full of cocaine and an incredibly tall tale to impart to his doting, (and extremely dull) seamstress girlfriend, Carolina (Kasia Smutniak).

Good Cop/Bad Cop? Dull Cop/Mad Cop.

From Paris With Love is nonsense from lacklustre start to pyrotechnic laden finish, hinging weakly on the non-existent chemistry between the two male leads. Buddy movies demand sharp comic timing, and a clearly defined narrative arc for the characters from distrust and irritation to mutual admiration. Morel’s film has none of these qualities, leaving Travolta to blast each location to smithereens as a spectacularly wooden Rhys Meyers pouts in the background. The younger man fails to kindle a single spark of sexual attraction to Smutniak, and his pivotal scene, a heartfelt monologue about the power of love, is utterly excruciating. Our French farewell to James and Charlie cannot come soon enough. Mon Dieu.

How did you find the city of love in all its head-exploding glory? Let us know below!

Happy Families

Set in the 1950s, Revolutionary Road centres on the relationship between Alice (Kate Winslet) and Frank Wheeler (Leo DiCaprio); a married couple in their late twenties. Seen as the shining example of wedded bliss by their friends and neighbours living on Revolutionary Road, they have two children, a secure future and a beautiful home. But beneath their flawless exterior both Alice and Frank feel as though their lives are being wasted. Frank works all day at a job he hates, sure that he has untapped genius that is being left undiscovered. Alice once had dreams of becoming an actress, but it seems that – as we see in the opening scenes – her talent never really matched her ambition. Both are deflated, frustrated, and terrified that they have run out of chances. They are growing apart, Alice harbors deep resentment for Frank’s lack of belief in her, and Frank has begun turning to other women for comfort.

New Beginnings

Everything changes when one day, Alice proposes the family moves to Paris for a new start. She will get a secretarial job, and Frank will finally be free to read, to write, to have those great thoughts both of them are so sure are within him. Their friends and colleagues think they’re crazy, but they revel in the limitless freedom of the idea. Finally, they think, they will live again. Alice is deliriously happy at the idea that Frank will finally have the future he has always deserved, and the idea that she will get back the man she married. But when Frank is suddenly offered a big promotion, his once-menial job doesn’t seem so menial anymore. Frank has to decide what is most important to him and to his family, and the weight of the decision threatens to tear the couple apart.

This is a beautiful film, assuredly directed by Sam Mendes, who is no stranger to maneauvering through the subtleties that make up a relationship. DiCaprio and Winslet shine in their measured performances of two people on the brink of both bliss and despair, and thanks to a brilliant and faithful screenplay by Justin Hythe every scene feels heartbreakingly real, every character satisfyingly rounded. A special mention must also go to Michael Shannon, whose portrayal of Robert – a tortured, unstable but ultimately painfully observant visitor to the Wheeler home – is achingly brilliant. Like a herald of doom, he drags the truth into the domestic lie the couple have worked so hard to create for themselves, whipping up a climax that will have you gripped to the seat until the very end. Unmissable stuff.

Special Features

Lives of Quiet Desperation: The Making of Revolutionary Road
Deleted Scenes
Interviews with DiCaprio and Winslet

What did you think? A revolution, or have we all been down this road before? Let us know below!

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