Confirming that the only person in the world capable of loving Jaden Smith is his own father, After Earth makes a mockery of the sci-fi genre. Predictable, boring and occasionally unintelligible, M. Night Shyamalan has once again made a rather large misstep in his career. Whatever talent he may have once had cannot be seen in After Earth, not in the story, the photography or the direction. In a year replete with big-budget sci-fi like Oblivion, Elysium and Star Trek Into Darkness, After Earth has the Best For Film Official Guarantee to be the worst of them all.

J.J. Abrams’ vision of the classic space-faring franchise continues to dominate the increasingly-crowded sci-fi genre. After the successful reboot in 2009, the tricky follow-up of Star Trek Into Darkness had a lot to live up to; not only its predecessor, but the much beloved original series. It’s the loudest, fastest, shiniest, most slick, most beautiful and yes, most entertaining Star Trek to date, but this does come at a cost of the introspection and consideration that was previously associated with the series. That being said, Star Trek Into Darkness is a brilliant blockbuster – just expect it to be closer to Transformers than to Wrath of Khan.

A brief flash of lens flare illuminates Alice Eve.

With the teaser trailer for Star Trek Into Darkness finally out, let’s look back at one of the most successful reboots of one of the most successful franchises in history. No one could have predicted how good J.J. Abrams would make Star Trek. For our tribute, let us drink as if we’ve just failed the Kobayashi Maru for the 10th time!

KHAAAAAAAAAAAN!