That’s Mobile to you and me.

As the BBFC rescues us from the horror of / robs us of the chance to see and evaluate The Human Centipede: Full Sequence (delete as appropriate), we’ve taken a moment to look back at some of the other films which have, over the years, been banned from British screens. You may be surprised at what we’ve found…

Shhhiiiiiiittt.

Wes Craven: Two words that by their associative powers alone, can conjure inimitable phantasmagoric visions from which you cannot avert your eyes, but in the dead of sleepless night, so desperately wish you had. Whether it’s the snicker-snack of finger-knives or an Edvard Munchian bogeyman that threatens our dreams, it’s high-time that we got ourselves educated on the hand that wields them…

Not content with desecrating the legacy of such horror classics as The Wicker Man, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Hitchcock’s own Psycho, Hollywood is now setting out to turn The Birds into yet another lifeless, pointless, remake.