Ewww…. Ahhhh…. Eeeesh… That doesn’t go there! Let’s be honest: you don’t want to read this article and we’re really sorry we wrote it. Mildly NSFW, and seriously NSFSanity.

Perhaps you’d noticed, but multiplex cinemas are starting to get really, really pricey. This would be fine if the experience was improving, but it’s not. It’s getting worse. After one too many sub-par screenings, maybe it’s time to find somewhere else to get our fix..

If you love horror films and you have at least twenty-four hours to live, then there is absolutely nothing you should be doing more than reading (and subsequently adhering to) this itinerary. How else are you going to know what to watch at six thirty in the morning when you’ve just watched a zombie baby rip someone’s head open?

On December 11th, The Lovely Bones gets a limited release Stateside, with the full shebang rolling out a whole month later on the 15th. Over in the land of Blightly, we’ll get our fill of Peter Jackson’s latest a full six weeks later on January 29th, pretty much last in the world release queue. Not that we should feel maligned – the release date has been endlessly shunted about (it was originally slated for March 2008), ostensibly to ensure The Lovely Bones a spot on the Oscars shortlist.