Hey, you! Yeah, you! You look like the sort of guy who knows less than he should about Australian actors. Specifically, 43-year-old Australian actors who have starred in films ranging from drag queen comedies to period dramas via cannibal war flicks. Actors like Guy Pearce, in fact. Get yo’ass in here, boy, you’ve got a lot to learn…

Pretty much au fait with your ‘Cinema Du Look’ directors? Yeah, we thought not. This is what happens if you spend your days in your worst pants, watching re-runs of Dragon Ball Z (rock the dragon) and drinking Tango. Thank God you have us and Cheat Sheet Tuesday, eh?

Psst! What do you know about Marion Cotillard? Yeah, obviously she’s gorgeous – and yes, she was indeed in bloody Inception. Honestly, is that all you’ve got? It’s a worry, it really is. If we were you, we’d be on the look out for some sort of helpful sheet of facts with which you could cheat your way through a conversation about her…

Where would Back To The Future be without that beautiful aural backdrop of “DER NERRR ner ner ne ner NER NER NER, DER NERRRR de ne ner ner ner NER”? Admittedly it loses something in translation, but the point is, this week’s cheat sheet is dedicated to the man who makes Robert Zemekis sound like a champion: Alan Silvestri.

At Cheat Sheet Villas (it’s a granny flat in the grounds of Best For Film Towers), we’re always on the lookout for stars with a less extravagant public profile than the Britneys and LiLos of the world; then we expose them and shamelessly drag all their secrets into the merciless light of day like squirming vampire children being torn from their coffins. This week, it’s the turn of screenwriter extraordinaire Jane Goldman!

This week’s cheat sheet takes the imposing form of cinematic iconoclast and sometime magician Orson Welles. Where do you start with a man famous for doing just about everything? Well, let us show you…

Wes Craven: Two words that by their associative powers alone, can conjure inimitable phantasmagoric visions from which you cannot avert your eyes, but in the dead of sleepless night, so desperately wish you had. Whether it’s the snicker-snack of finger-knives or an Edvard Munchian bogeyman that threatens our dreams, it’s high-time that we got ourselves educated on the hand that wields them…

As nutritious as a newly felled apple (can apples get felled?) and twice as shiny, we present this week’s Cheat Sheet: all you need to know about indie-turned-Hollywood director Darren Aronofsky. Creator of Black Swan, The Wrestler, Requiem For A Dream and more; prepare to know a whole lot about the king of existentialism.

Of the 598 French directors listed on Wikipedia, Jean-Pierre Jeunet is one of the few you’re more or less guaranteed to have heard of – you might not have bothered with Delicatessen, but everyone remembers that nice film with the orgasm sequence and the girl from The Da Vinci Code, don’t they? If that’s as much as you know then it’s time to fill in the gaps, and if you’re thinking “what orgasm sequence?” then there’s no time to lose – get Cheat Sheeting.

From the nervy world of stand up comedy to the bright lights of Hollywood, Simon Pegg has made quite a journey. Pre-empting a shaky critical reception of the soon-to-land Paul, we review the rise (soon to fall?) of everyone’s favourite supergeek.