Nothing quite kills a career like a brush with the undead…

Yes, it has happened. No, you can’t make it stop.

Excellent directorial fiction debut from well-known actor Diego Luna, Abel is a comedy which is by turns charming, powerful and absorbing. Unlikely to be given a wide release, this is well worth seeking out if a cinema in your area is screening it.

Disney brings us the true story of Secretariat, the most successful race-horse in United States history. Diane Lane and John Malkovich star in this heartwarming equestrian cheese-fest.

Bruce Willis. Morgan Freeman. John Malkovich. Dame Helen Mirren. These are hefty names. It might seem reasonable to assume that a film capable of bringing them together would be pretty bloody special, mightn’t it? Unfortunately, it seems that all it takes is a production company with very deep pockets. Seeing Red is a truly unhappy experience which you are advised to avoid.

Morgan Freeman has been awarded the American Film Institute’s Life Achievement Award. Quite right too.

Jonah Hex is arguably what you’d get if you transposed Van Helsing to 1876 Virginia, stripped every joke and ironic line out of the script, replaced the mediocre CGI vampires with dreadful CGI corpses and then forcefully raped John Malkovich’s reputation with a branding iron. It’s spectacularly awful.

It’s a bit of a double-whammy for any John Malkovich fans out there: Not one, but two snippets of news for y’all, and they’re both comic book related. The first comes, naturally enough, from Italian sports show Quelli Che il Calcio, which recently featured Malkovich as a guest.

It’s not good news for fans of the webhead. After rumblings around the net seemed to suggest that trouble was brewing for the fourth instalment of the ever-popular Spider-Man franchise, it’s now been revelead that the whole project is in danger of collapsing totally and – perhaps – irrevocably.

Looks like the villains for the hotly anticipated Spider-Man 4 have managed to leak online. Movieline has reported that we’re to be treated to a feathered duo knocking heads with the webslinger sometime in 2011. Since the end of the disappointingly messy Spider-Man 3, rumours have been flying about concerning which of his menagerie of villains would be popping up next.