Do you know what would happen if we stopped producing a sweet dose of mash-up for you every Monday? Neither do we, but now we’ve started we’re afraid to stop in case some properly biblical shit goes down. This is probably how the Aztecs ended up ripping out the beating hearts of hundreds of their enemies every day – they weren’t sure it would appease Quetzlcoatl, the feathered serpent god, but they didn’t know what else it might be doing.

We’re not going to lie, it’s a bit odd this week. But that won’t stop you, creeping inexorably towards the blog like one of those menacing disembodied hands which turns up in four out of every five zombie movies. Creepy… creepy… creepy OH GOD IT’S A NEXT GENERATION SPEEDY ZOMBIE NOT A ROMERO ZOMBIE IT’S RUNNING IT’S EATING MY MOTHER NOOOOOOO

We don’t want to blow our own trumpets, but this might be the best Monday Mash-Up yet. Obviously we think much the same thoughts every week, but there’s no reason to leave good opinions of that nature in our internal monologue forever. What do you think? Have a bloody look!

We spoil you, really we do. First you have a lovely weekend filled with scrumping and lashings of ginger beer (this continues to assume that our core readership is the Famous Five) and then you get a lovely Monday Mash-Up to help get you through that first grinding day of another miserable week, which is in itself nothing but one more plodding step towards the silently waiting grave. Enjoy!

Here we all are again. It’s easily done – you think you can just say no next week, busy yourself on IMDb and forget the mash-up… but everyone comes crawling back.

Look, I’m not going to waste your time or mine with so-called ‘words’; we both know what you’re here for. Proceed downwards, young one, and gorge yourself on mash-up.

It’s Monday. You clearly want a mash-up – and why shouldn’t you? Mondays are made for mash-ups, we believe that’s a well-established axiom at this point. So with no further ado, here’s your mash-up this Monday.

It’s a Monday, and you know perfectly well what that means – it’s time for us to improve one of your favourite film posters by getting our wizardry on and arbitrarily replacing a star with… well, someone else. Someone, ideally, whose name can be easily fashioned into a pun.

What’s iconic performance got to do, got to do with it? In our MONDAY MASH-UP, we thoughtfully re-cast cinematic classics to give much-loved tales the edge for which they’re crying out. The question is: can you figure out who’s been given the chop? (NB: If you can’t, we would advise medical assistance).