A few days ago, Best For Film’s editor John Underwood said something very, very rash on Twitter: “Deckard was so a replicant.” Just the sort of blasé observation that would usually pass unnoticed amongst the LOLcats and nasty comments about Giles Coren… usually, yes, but not this time. Comedian, musician, musical comedian, comic musician and bard/jester extraordinaire Mitch Benn heroically decided to set the record straight and, over the course of the longest article we have ever published, now presents his defence of the much-maligned 1982 cut of Ridley Scott’s masterpiece Blade Runner. Hold on to your synthetic snakes…

Who are the most baked, caned, hopped-up or tripped-out characters in movie history? Here, in the sort of order which can only really be dreamt up through a haze of quaaludes, mescaline and Night Nurse, are our top ten.