It’s jean-creaming time.
GIVE ME MY LEGOs BACK!
With Romney taking on America’s no-good, tax-dodgin’, health-care expectin’ 47%, Mrs Michelle doing the majority of the sweet talking and everyone trying to figure out just what a ‘legitimate rape’ actually is, there’s never been a more perfect time for a slicing satire of the USA’s governmental boxing ring. The Campaign isn’t it, sadly. But who needs game-changing home truths when the dog from The Artist is being punched in the face?
Gird your loins, everyone: it’s arrived. The film which inspired the following words from Roger Ebert: “Describing the movie is bringing down the level of my prose.” A “billion dollar movie” featuring the likes of Jeff Goldblum, Will Ferrell, Robert Loggia, Zach Galifianakis and John C Reilly. A film so strange and offensive it led to a number of furious walkouts from audience members during a screening at the Sundance festival. Yes, Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie is upon us, and goddamnit is it a beautiful, terrifying spectacle.
“Football is 80% mental and 40% physical.” Erroneous mathematics is just one of the highlights of that hallowed cornerstone of the film industry; the sports movie. Other than sex, the only other thing which has the power to absolutely unite the sexes is a good sports film; everyone’s equal in the stadium, you know? Dudes put on makeup and call it “warpaint”, women start bottling people in the stands, everyone wears skintight Lycra – sports movies bring out the pikey banter-lad in us all. It’s hot, the Olympics are nigh – let’s get rowdy.