You can um and ah about what to order for your viewing pleasure this Christmas, but there really is only one list – and we’ve got it. You can thank us later, for now; grab a fresh piece of paper, get your stocking ready and pray you’ve been good this year. Santa is on red-alert for the ultimate Christmas wish-list.

Like turkey, disappointing crackers and the traditional game of ‘find grandad’s wig’, Christmas films are always the same. And the strange thing is, we wouldn’t want it any other way. What is on your essential Christmas film list? We bet you’ll find at least a few of them here…

As much as we love to moan about the ‘too good to be true’ on-screen relationship, there exists something far worse; the utterly baffling on-screen relationship. From girls having sex with Death in Meet Joe Black to questionable sexual age politics in Big, we feel it’s time for these dodgy love affairs to be exposed for what they are; bloody weird.

Call us crazy, but we thought Christmas was the time for good cheer? There’s not much to be cheerful about in this dark adaptation of the Dickens classic. With pacey action and good performances there is still something to enjoy, but if we’re honest, at Christmas we just want to leave the cinema with sleighbells in our ears and a smile on our faces.