In the immortal words of Noddy Holder, “IT’S CHRIIISSSSSTTTMAAAAASSS!!”. Well, not quite yet. But it is the first day of December today (we don’t miss a trick here at BFF). And to celebrate, we bring you the top ten films that sound as though they should be about Christmas but really, really aren’t. Luckily, we’ve reinvented all these titles to make them more palatable this Yule.

It’s an irony that can’t have been lost on Steven Soderburgh. Matt Damon – tiny-faced, neckless mannequin that he is – goes from playing sociopathic amnesiac Jason Bourne to the chubby, toupéed middle-manager Mark Whitacre in the space of only a couple of films.