Articles Posted by the Author

  • In The Land of The Free

    A devastatingly right-on documentary determined to plumb the depths of America’s capital punishment system, In the Land Of The Free follows the life and times of three men: Herman Wallace, Albert Woodfox, and Robert King – collectively known as ‘The Angola Three’. Between them, they have spent over a century in solitary confinement for the murder of a prison guard; a murder that, in all likelihood, they never committed. It’s all sufficiently horrid, worthy stuff – but we have to ask, why is Samuel L involved?

  • Legacy: Black Ops

    When future alien archaeologists dig up the remains of our culture, they’ll find coke cans, packets of exotically and confusingly-flavoured condoms, and many decades’ worth of brutality-based dramas. Who know what they’ll make of Legacy: Black Ops. Perhaps it depends if they’ve seen every single psychological thriller, every single film about espionage and corruption, and every single film about a single, complicated man who people just can’t seem to understand.

  • How Much Does Your Building Weigh, Mr. Foster?

    How Much Does Your Building Weigh, Mr Foster? is a film about architecture. And while architecture’s great, and we all love to walk the Man On Wire tightrope between being entertained and fully engaged like unbearable brainiacs, we have to ask: where are the action sequences? Where’s the exposed flesh? Sure, without architecture, we’d probably all be living in rickety bamboo shacks, looking a bit like Tom Hanks during the later stages of his stay in Castaway, and attempting to eat raw chicken. However, spending 72 minutes of our lives forcing ourselves to be impressed with a film about it is another matter entirely.

  • Stonehenge Apocalypse

    In all honesty, you might not even need to read this review; Stonehenge Apocalypse is exactly as you imagined it when you saw the SKULL IN A MUSHROOM CLOUD on its poster. Still, know thine enemy and all that…

  • Harry Potter And The Inevitable Future

    At the turn of the millennium, while we ordinary folk were struggling with our spelling, the Harry Potter Three; Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, and Rupert Grint were being pampered and preened, photographed and photoshopped, and showered with riches. It’s enough to give us ordinary folk a severe case of heebie-jeebie jealousy. Most importantly, it’s enough to send the trio abso-Jackson-lutely mental. Here, we provide the frankest, honestest account of the baffling circus that became the lives of the cursed stars from 2011 to the present day (which is 2031, of course).

  • Back to the Future – popping the time bubble

    To celebrate the triumphant re-release of Back to the Future, the time travel comedy which changed our perception of DeLoreans forever, we’re taking a look back at our favourite trilogy and desperately trying to work out what was going on. What’s going to happen in 2015? Why don’t hoverboards work on water (unless you’ve got POWER)? And did Robert Zemeckis have any idea what sort of four-dimensional can of worms he was opening way back in 1985? That’s the power of BTTF…