Does that mean she has to wear an underwired nightgown when Dracula comes through the window? That always happens in Transylvania. They give you underwired nightgowns instead of rubbish dressing gowns in the hotels.

There’s a lot to worry about when it comes to the delicate, supple young minds of our children. But rather than bubblewrapping the family computer and locking the shed, maybe we should look a bit deeper into what kids films tell our children about life. We’ve examined (in great, hasty detail) the classic films kids love to watch and we must say, the results are urine-inducing…