Take Shelter is destroying cinema screens up and down the country with a combination of tornadoes, earthquakes and Michael Shannon, and if we somehow live through that there’s always another film waiting to wipe out humanity. Still, you’ve got to laugh, eh? Rather than get depressed about the inevitable extinguishing of our world, we’ve decided to look at Hollywood’s top 10 most baffling apocalyptic films…

In the immortal words of Noddy Holder, “IT’S CHRIIISSSSSTTTMAAAAASSS!!”. Well, not quite yet. But it is the first day of December today (we don’t miss a trick here at BFF). And to celebrate, we bring you the top ten films that sound as though they should be about Christmas but really, really aren’t. Luckily, we’ve reinvented all these titles to make them more palatable this Yule.

Do you like films with balls in them? Well it’s your lucky day, friend/cinematic ball devotee. Today marks the release of baseball biopic Moneyball and in honour of this occasion, BFF has compiled a list of the Top Ten Film Titles Containing the Word “Ball”/the Top Ten Balltastic Films. Whichever way you look at it, it’s a load of balls.

You know what’s great about actors? Sometimes they make a really good film. Then again, sometimes they make a really bad film. And sometimes, just sometimes, the same actor does both within a remarkably short space of time. Join us as we count down the ten actors who’ve flipped the classic/flop switch with incredible speed.

There’s going to be a Doctor Who movie materialising in cinemas soon, most likely with that weird whoooshing sound effect. Now if they want to do this, it turns out they’re going to need an actor to play the Doctor (we were as shocked as you were). So we thought we’d give the film producers a hand, and let you all know our picks for who would make superb Doctors Whos.

Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1 is out this Friday. SCREAM SCREAM SWOONY DREAMZ OMFG ZZZZZ3333. Everyone is going to poop when they see this film. In honour of it coming into the world like a screaming demon baby that claws its way out, bloodied and howling, from the ruins of its mothers womb, BFF have compiled a list of the Top 10 Worst Films that the Cast of Twilight Had A Hand In. Or: the Top Ten Films Cursed by Twilight. Enjoy.

There are so many awesome Christmas films out there, each with a unique and viable message. The Grinch teaches us that ‘Christmas means a little bit more’ which is, at the best of times, a tad vague. Elf teaches us that ‘the best way to spread Christmas cheer is by singing loud for all to hear’… but what’s the “cheer factor” really about? We need a NATIVITY, is what we need. Donkeys and innkeepers and paranoid shepherds, to make it all clear. With a celebrity ensemble cast, so it can take on Love Actually in style…

So it looks like they’re making a LEGO film. And by “they” we mean the crazy people in Hollywood who want all the money but their brains don’t work any more because they replaced their brains with sushi and velvet yachts and cynicism so they think money can come from a film about inanimate bricks. WHAT COULD THIS FILM POSSIBLY BE ABOUT?!?! Luckily for you, Hollywood fat cats, BFF have compiled a list of LEGO-inspired films to make the process a bit easier for you. Enjoy!

So you’re a character in a film. Congratulations! And you’re about to meet your onscreen death. Ah, not so great. Still, you’ve got time to say a single line. A line that has the chance to be immortalised in cinema history. A line that will be quoted time and time again by pop culture nerds in bad accents. What do you say? Well, let’s look at some of the all-time greats for a bit of inspiration.
(SPOILERS SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY SPOILERS)

How exactly does one come up with a killer idea for a TV pilot? Not only have all the good ideas been taken, they’ve been rehashed, span-off, re-made, re-imagined, re-worked flogged, revived and flogged again. And mostly, they’ve got Hugh Laurie in. Having examined the recent US small-screen output, we’re pretty confident we can see patterns emerging… The question is, which ones should you bother with?