November, eh? “Season of fog and embarrassing incidents during which you slip on a frosty patch of ground and everyone asks if you had an ice bloody trip“, as Keats memorably described it. Still, what else is that revolting scarf your aunty gave you for if not to wipe icy sludge off your jeggings? And when you get home, you can look forward to an evening spent in a toasty bath with your page-a-day planner, perusing this lovely list of the film events we’re most excited about over the next month and deciding which are for you. What? You’re going to go to all of them? You go, Glen Coco!

London Children’s Film Festival

30th Oct – 7th Nov

Technically speaking, the above image (from A Tale of Two Mozzies, in case you were wondering) is only relevant if what you’re interested in is the London Children’s Festival 2008. We’re not, but we can’t resist an insect on a bicycle. Ahem. Now in its sixth year, the LCFF programme offers a huge variety of films from around the world as well as some home-grown life action and animation specials, with a mix of feature-length films and shorts to cater for every attention span. Best of all, to coincide with its Blu-Ray rerelease the festival is hosting a Back To The Future bonanza, featuring a quiz and even a replica DeLorean time machine! We’re debating the merits of nicking some kids so we can go along.

Fancy some escapism at the LCFF? The details are all here.

UK Jewish Film Festival

4th-21st Nov

We’re certainly going to be rocking the synagogue at this year’s UKJFF, which is showing an astonishing sixty-eight films (count ’em – we did) over a two and a half week stretch starting next week – including a sneak preview of Helen Mirren’s forthcoming film The Debt at its opening gala night on the 4th. But wait, there’s more! As well as a packed schedule of screenings, events will be popping up all over London to celebrate or highlight different aspects of film – look out for a variety of workshops, panels, and even a walking tour of London’s Theatreland which explores the Jewish connections throughout the West End.

Find out more about the UK Jewish Film Festival here.

Abertoir Horror Festival

10th-14th Nov

Abertoir is, quite frankly, shit hot. Even if you don’t like horror much (bear witness to the fact that neither I nor BFF queen bee Natasha could bear to see Paranormal Activity 2), you’ll find something at this extraordinary banquet of the macabre, at which modern horrors such as the inimitable Dead Hooker In A Trunk rub shoulders with spine-tingling classics from the silent era. We don’t know about you, but we think 1927 film The Cat And The Canary ‘with live piano accompaniment’ sounds pretty ace (not least because ‘the Cat’ is actually an escaped psycho who pegs it out of an asylum and hides in an attic). Our only Welsh pick for the month, this is definitely worth the drive.

Boo! Now you’re all giggly and jumpy, you’re ready to read more here.

DVMission 48 Hour Film Challenge

12th-14th Nov

This is basically going in because we’re impressed by anyone who can stay up for more than about six hours without getting sleepy. The 411 is that various intrepid (read: idiotic) teams of actors and film-makers have a 48-hour window over the above weekend in which they have to make a two-minute film with a title and genre – not to mention one tricksy line of text – which is supplied to them at the start line. Frankly, this is bloody brilliant. We’d love to go but unfortunately we’re allergic to Portsmouth, so we’ll be excitedly looking out for anything cropping up on YouTube. In the meantime, do pop along if you’re in the South – the competitors could probably do with a cuddle and a good cry by the end of the weekend.

It’s too late to enter, but you can check out the competitors here!

French Film Festival UK

11th Nov – 7th Dec

But Best For Film, isn’t French cinema impossibly arty and inaccessible? No, of course it isn’t. The French Film Festival UK, which is inexplicably based in eight different Scottish locations and only one in England (London, natch), is providing another fabulous programme of feature-length films and shorts from contemporary directors as well as slipping in a few cheeky cult classics. We’ll be all over the London screenings at the Cine Lumière, but if you manage to attend one of the events North of the border then tell us how it went! Whether or not anyone gets to see it, we’re just pleased that a film called La Journée de la Jupe even exists.

Get the inside scoop on the FFFUK (hee!) here.

Pretty tasty stuff, eh? And that’s only the cream of the crop – we’ve shamelessly cherrypicked the events we’re most excited about, so if you grub around and find something else you think we should be talking about then let us know in the comments box below! We hope to see you out and about at some of the huge variety of exciting events clogging up our silver screens this November – remember, a film is safer than a firework. Unless you’re James Franco’s character in 127 Hours, in which case you lose an arm either way. Cue slo-mo commercial.

Hungry for more fabulous Film events this November? Journey here, fair traveller…