Hi! I’m not Troy McClure. You might remember me from other such features as “Top 10 Aimless 80’s Nostalgia Trips” and “Waffling On About Something Irrelevant That Causes Me Disproportionate Anger”. Now, let’s stroll together down a list of the great Mr. McClure’s oft-name dropped movies, and see which ones should be jammed into production like a fish in a sock.

As much as we love to moan about the ‘too good to be true’ on-screen relationship, there exists something far worse; the utterly baffling on-screen relationship. From girls having sex with Death in Meet Joe Black to questionable sexual age politics in Big, we feel it’s time for these dodgy love affairs to be exposed for what they are; bloody weird.

In this world of book adaptations, videogame-turned-blockbuster and TV series: The Film, it was only a matter of time before movie makers turned to board games for inspiration. No? No, we didn’t think so either. But for better or for worse, Monopoly: The Movie seems to be underway. We investigated the potential film plot thus far, and we can promise you now, it’s worth a look.

Johnny Depp and Tim Burton’s seventh film together, Alice in Wonderland is set for release early next year. As we wait in anticipation for a trippy tale of a girl in wonderland and a madhatter, let’s refresh our memories with the six films which helped to establish one of the strongest director/actor relationships in Hollywood.

CGI effects have revolutionised modern filmmaking to the extent that effects alone can make or break a movie. But is an over-reliance on CGI driving audiences away and cheapening the cinematic experience? We take a look at the computer generated revolution – and how the revolutionaries might soon find themselves in the firing line.

Hollywood’s bent for all things cheesy is perhaps best embodied in that most haunting of spectres, the child actor. From their cutesy giggles to their moronic lisps, we count down the five most irritating mugs ever to grace the screen at the tender age of precocious.

We can’t help but notice that Hollywood loves to up the explosion-and-sex factor with Britain’s classic literature. One only needs to look at the bare chest of Robert Downey Jr as the new Sherlock Holmes to see that the silver screen doesn’t mind taking a few liberties. But what other classic-but-uncool tales are Hollywood missing out on? We re-imagine some great British classics the way Spielberg would do ’em…

Citizen Kane: It continually tops the “Best Film Ever” polls and is a byword for cinematic greatness. But are the plaudits exaggerated, and is there anything there for the modern moviegoer? Jon Cooper explains why for once, the hype might be justified…

As our economy spirals into the abyss of recession with no hope of returning to good health any time soon, everyone is cutting their budget.It’s the perfect time for Hollywood directors to start economising too. Not on film quality, but on choice of protagonists. Where they can’t afford the original A-lister, there’s a number of cheaper alternatives for them to choose from.

From horror flicks to romances, Hollywood owes some of its most original film ideas to the Asian film industry, and has done for the past 40 years. And why not? Remakes of Asian films offer a cheap and market-tested method of reaching audiences and earning big bucks. But simply buying the rights does not always a smash hit make.