Ahhhh Sunday. The day where pure, unadulterated Watching is, legally, the only thing any self-respecting human can do. Hang up those thoughts of productivity – they can wait till Monday. Settle down into your pants, get trailer happy, and figure out what you’ll be watching this week…

Another week, another torrent of news which nobody will care about by Monday. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t care now! A thorough grounding in contemporary film trivia is the best CV in the world, and we’re here to make sure you get the job of your dreams (working in Blockbuster)…

Do you know what’s out next week? The 3D version of Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace, that’s what. We’re warily eyeing our invite to the screening and wondering how we could possibly get out of going. To keep us distracted from the inevitably disappointing experience, we’ve decided to get very drunk and mock George Lucas. So grab some Ewoks, a bucketful of booze and a novelty lightsaber-stirrer; things are about to get messy…

OH MY GOD IT’S COLD! The best place to be when it’s cold is definitely tucked up in a warm, germy cinema, breathing in everyone else’s diseases and comforting your pancreas with a dose of nutritious citrus. But what will your eyes do whilst your pancreas is having a smoothie and your immune system is dying? Time to find out!

The first silent film to win an award in ninety years is doing more than that – it’s sweeping the board at every ceremony going. But will The Artist‘s unprecedented success herald a new trend of homages to the silent films which continue to shape modern pop culture? Nicola Marchant finds out more…

She was in Monster! She was in those J’Adore adverts! She’s… she’s… wait, she’s South African? You don’t know nearly enough about Charlize Theron, and frankly its getting on our nerves. With the release of Young Adult just around the corner, it’s time you stopped hopefully googling disgusting words about her and got to grips with some cold, hard facts.

It’s Monday, and after a solid couple of days of recreational brain cell murder you’re probably feeling a bit rough up in the head bits. Whether your weapon of choice was Jagermeister or the new season of The Only Way Is Essex (shame on you all), we have the perfect brain workout to get the poor withered thing back into shape; a healthy dose of David Lynch.

Adam Sandler has irritated the hard-working folks at BFF Towers just one too many times. He’d been treading a dogged path with us, pumping out horrible slapstick comedies, but then he did Funny People. And we thought “hey… maybe we’ve been wrong about Adam? Maybe he’s not so… OH MY GOD IT’S JACK AND JILL!!! The horror! THE HORROR!” So then we decided to invent fun and new ways to murder him. Roll on the top 10 missed opportunities for killing Adam Sandler…

Sure, you could read about this week’s releases. You could engage in intellectual discourse about the benefits of the latest action-thriller over the seductive Oscar fodder, you could peruse the latest cinematic theories and pluck your opinions from the pantheon of great critique – but you know what? It’s Sunday. Let’s just watch all the trailers instead.

It’s Saturday morning – you’d planned to get up early and make the most of the day, but instead you hid under the covers until quarter to eleven like a shut-in with a passion for snuggliness. You’re such a failure. But never mind – if you’re not going to experience the world first-hand, you can just catch up on the best of the week’s movie news with our regular round-up!