We definitely would.

In London this thursday? Apollo Cinemas is screening the operatic film Carmen in 3D. If you fancy ruffles and ribbons of blood aplenty, enter our competition NOW to win a pair of tickets! Winners notified Thursday morning…

It’s a bit of a different direction for Lois Lane, but…

A touching tale about a man navigating his way through conflicting relationships, He’s My Girl is an unexpected, quietly charming and exceedingly Parisian love story. There are perhaps a few too many loose ends left hanging for it to be a truly satisfying watch, but there’s no question that this is an extremely classy alternative to your Nora Ephron-type fodder.

‘Nevermore’, cried Poe’s raven. Something of a film critic, he was talking of the glut of vampire films in 2010. Will our grumpy naysayer feel the same way the same of upcoming superhero films this year? You decide. We cherry-pick 10 superhero films to see in 2011…

Takeshi Kitano’s film about the Japanese yakuza may possess all the ingredients – violence, family loyalty and a strict hierarchy – but each wincingly gruesome scene is also strangely hilarious, leaving you laughing at the screen as you watch from behind your hands.

Direct from Geneva’s Black Movie Festival comes our review of The Tiger Factory, a triumph of Malaysian neo-realism (nope, we didn’t either) which will make you question the limits of your self-reliance and the exact situation in which you could be persuaded to milk a pig of its semen.

Anthony Hopkins and some chap you’ve never heard of star in a film which is stuck halfway between psychological thriller and demon-haunted horror. Solid performances and a refreshing rejection of SFX go some way towards redeeming this confused, lumpen effort, but it’s still a long way from being welcomed into the divine presence.

We spoil you, really we do. First you have a lovely weekend filled with scrumping and lashings of ginger beer (this continues to assume that our core readership is the Famous Five) and then you get a lovely Monday Mash-Up to help get you through that first grinding day of another miserable week, which is in itself nothing but one more plodding step towards the silently waiting grave. Enjoy!

Now that Zac Efron and Hilary Duff are nearing retirement, America is clearly cowering at the prospect of an empty podium. Scouting a 14 year old Justin Bieber on YouTube, the US of A has a new poster child for hard work, family values and segways. Should you accidentally find yourself in the wrong screen, maybe avoid the overwhelming instinct to reach for your gag reflex and gouge out your brain as there are a number of nice visual touches and bop-tastic tunes that just keep this docu-concert on the right side of God-awful.