Pooh Bear, Piglet, Tigger, Eeyore, Owl, Rabbit, Kanga, Roo and Christopher Robin return to the screen for their first canon outing in 34 years; this time they’re on the hunt for Eeyore’s lost tail, whilst trying to rescue Christopher Robin from the terrible Backson and find Tigger a friend to bounce with. And is it really so unreasonable of Pooh to want a little honey to look forward to? Prepare to haemorrhage nostalgia.

Oh, Russell. You’re very lovely, we’ve known that for many years, but when will you stop playing the embarrassingly over-privileged cheeky chappy with a history of raucous and debauched behaviour – all pretty method – and actually do something worth watching? Arthur is elaborate, sparkly, charming and ultimately pointless, like an ornamental unicorn goad carved from a huge rock crystal by blind nuns. Exactly like that.

Guillermo del Toro fans will be delighted with ABEL, a fantastical film about a mute Mexican boy who starts speaking in the manner of his mother’s missing partner. We have 3 x ABEL DVDs to give away! Competition ends 16 May 2011.

Compared to great unique films like Donnie Darko and Inception, Ink is a fantastic indie supernatural thriller about a fantasy world and a businessman’s love for his daughter. We have 3 DVD copies to give away! Competition ends 11 May 2011.

Competition closed. Winners: D Mullooly, K Scott, Y Brownsea

Damn Your Eyes is a Grindhouse Western about an eyeless badass cowboy who drinks goat’s milk and goes from town to town exacting bloody revenge on a past wrong. Creative swearing, smoke-filled saloons, Oedipal complexes and blood seeping into sawdust… what more could any Westploitation fan wish for?

You’d never expect action comedy Norwegian Ninja to live up to the glorious premise of its supercheese title. And yet this absurdist masterpiece from the producers of Dead Snow really does. Full of Norwegians, ninja and so, so much more…

Everyone in the world loved Monsters, the award-winning road trip sci-fi romance movie that got five star reviews all over the place. We have 1 x DVD and 1 x Blu-Ray to give away! Competition ends 06 May 2011, so get cracking.

A Turtle’s Tale, the biography of a dismally boring chelonian who spends fifty years biffing around in the sea and then turns into John Hurt, has been billed as an adventure/thrillride/treat etc “for all the family”. Should you wish to protest this blatant lie, the Trading Standards Institute can be found here; nobody over the age of five will find any joy in Sammy’s aimless paddling, trite relationships and pious eco-preaching.

Escape real-life horror this 2011 with the lovely dark thrill of the cinema. We’ve got a grab-bag of the top (nearly) 30 best horror films in 2011, from franchise blockbuster to indie foreign horror. Actually, 28. We had 30 but the last two were rubbish.