His first starring role since making the relatively short trip back to Hollywood from the L.A. governor’s mansion, Arnold Schwarzenegger creaks back onto the big screen in a routine actioner that bets big on nostalgia for the one-liners and stiff acting he perfected so long ago. Does a dinosaur like Schwarzenegger have a place in an era dominated by wire-less martial arts madness and the kind of jumped-up hyper-kinetic combat pioneered by the Bourne franchise? The Last Stand is a lesson in the saving grace of star power, even if it doesn’t burn quite as bright as it used to.

Arnie’s Back…and he’s so, so old

He plays a sheriff and his catchphrase is “I feel old”

Attn. whoever’s writing the screenplay. Please write in a scene where Sheriff Arnie has to shop an adulterer. PLEASE.