Remember the good old days? Before you decided it would be a good idea to watch ‘A Serbian Film’ because everyone told you not to (seriously, don’t). You know, when horror could be scary without damaging you and all your subsequent relationships for the rest of your life. Back when all the kids at school were talking about that awesome new American movie with the big silver ring and the videotape that makes you die. Well now it’s time to look shamefully back, and chastise your adolescent self for thinking for one second that a western remake of that ‘movie with the creepy Japanese girl’ could come anywhere close to its original. Welcome to the world of J-horror.

Here we are, at everyone’s favourite refrain! Let’s celebrate by considering 5 of the best “gold rings” (they’re not all gold, they’re not all rings). We here at BFF are so very kind that we scoured cinema history in order to deliver 5 shiny circles into your brain via your optic nerve. You might remember Michael Fassbender doing a similar thing to Kevin Bacon in X-Men: First Class, but we promise to be more gentle than that.

No matter how much the phrase “art house” appears on the back of the DVD, or the flimsy references to “philosophie” in the director’s biography, this film’s intent is clearly to titillate. This it does not.

Sinister is frustrating, in that it’s almost a brilliant horror movie. It’s still a very good one; darkly disturbing, well acted, effectively shot and – yes – scary, but ironically it’s the film’s attempts at distancing itself from the plethora of sub-par horrors that ends up damaging the final product. Still, if you’re after an hour and a half of intense psychological and supernatural terror, Sinister delivers an oppressively creepy atmosphere and some genuinely disturbing imagery.

What’s that in the card-box box? Is a present? OH GOD OH GOD NO IT’S NOT.

Remake? No. Reinvent? Yes! Join us on an adventure in repetition as we go on an adventure in repetition. Learn your what to do and (more importantly) what not to do in the many occasions throughout your life when you will be called upon to direct the remake of a classic movie.

This horror flick is ‘Hide and Seek’ meets ‘The Blair Witch Project’. Except, rather than two acquaintances politely shaking hands and exchanging pleasantries, it’s two cars meeting at speed and resulting in a heap of twisted smoking metal…

Following up on our list of best horror remakes, guest blogger Richard has bitten the bullet and sat through some of the worst. Reading this blog may be cause for a little sympathetic squirming; still, at least you’ll never have to feel the real pain of seeing a classic defiled. Tedium. Silliness. Irrelevance – these films have em all!

Children are frightening. It’s probably their tiny hands. Whilst horror movies seem to utilise the ‘scary child trope’ a little too frequently these days, it’s worth remembering the good times of horrible, horrible children that wanted you dead (or at least maimed in some way). This top ten list encompasses the best of the nasty tykes that remind us all why birth control is so important.

Some ‘reimaginings’ of classic horror films are truly dire – House of Wax, anyone? – but there are a few examples which have endured just as impressively as their inspirations. So, just in case you haven’t grimaced enough today, it’s our Top 10 horror remakes!