Philip Seymour Hoffman brings us a tale about love, loss and life that tries its very best to hop on the first train to Quirksville. Unfortunately, it misses its connection, tries to take a boat instead, gets lost and ends up deep in the Uncanny Valley.

Adapted from Yazmina Reza’s play The God Of Carnage, Polanksi’s latest puts his trademark claustrophobia fetish to good use; creating a darkly comic, satisfyingly tense and brilliantly performed drama that, sadly, doesn’t quite make it to the finish line.

Simple, clever, funny and kind, self-styled “cancer comedy” 50/50 offers a lot more than its marketing might suggest. A brilliantly aware, honest look at a tale that one in three of us will live with; wonderful writing, careful casting and Seth Rogan at his thankfully un-irritating best make this an absolute masterclass.

Say what you like about the Big Society, we’re undoubtedly a nation built on Rowan Atkinson’s eyebrows. A paper-thin, utterly ridiculous and guiltily enjoyable romp through MI7’s most unlikely adventures – Johnny English Reborn would be nonsense if it weren’t in such safe hands.

Don’t let the name fool you; Dirty Pictures isn’t a charming piece of erotica. Sure, it MENTIONS sex, but… never mind. Instead, the film actually offers an amusing look at the life of “the godfather of ecstasy”, Alexander Shulgin.

A warm, funny, unassuming and genuinely original take on the traditional road movie, Natural Selection is a confident little comedy-drama about faith, trust, shame and forgiveness. A startling debut from writer/director Robbie Pickering – you might as well watch it, seeing as this is a fellow we’ll be hearing a lot more from in the future.

Two American girls become separated on a biking trip through the remote backroads of rural Argentina. Cue cautionary tale slathered with a healthy ol’ dose of girl-on-girl gore? Not quite. Beyond an opening scene vaguely suggestive of electrocution, and a (more tortuous) rendition of the Divinyls’ ‘I Touch Myself’ this is, by no means, the material from which to get one’s bloodlusty jollies.

Dance theatre is not a dirty word. Even if you normally find the idea of a film that contains almost nothing but dance to be the purest form of hell, the sheer quality of the dancing on display in Pina – and the immaculate way in which it’s presented – make it difficult to resist.

The muscle babes of Die Hard and G-Unit come in Setup, a painfully predictable action thriller. With plenty of guns, a bald mob boss or two, a handful of heavily clichéd Russians, a thirst for vengeance and the odd sexy lying bitch, there really isn’t anything original to this diamond heist gone wrong. Except for Fiddy Cent in a role where he takes no prisoners. Oh wait…

Who would have thought that the history of one of Australia’s greatest environmental catastrophes could have been so enjoyable? The Cane Toad or, as some Down Under like to call it, Public Enemy Number One, enjoys an in-depth documentary courtesy of toad-addict Mark Lewis. It tickles the funny bone, sure, but it teaches us that the toads are an unstoppable rebel force and they will take Australia, no matter what…