Blu (Jesse Eisenberg) is a blue macaw, who lives in domesticated bliss in Minnesota with his owner Linda, until they are paid a visit by ornithologist Tulio, who tells them..

Pooh Bear, Piglet, Tigger, Eeyore, Owl, Rabbit, Kanga, Roo and Christopher Robin return to the screen for their first canon outing in 34 years; this time they’re on the hunt for Eeyore’s lost tail, whilst trying to rescue Christopher Robin from the terrible Backson and find Tigger a friend to bounce with. And is it really so unreasonable of Pooh to want a little honey to look forward to? Prepare to haemorrhage nostalgia.

It’s safe to say Edward Cullen wouldn’t last five baleful minutes in the vampire-dystopia that is Stake Land. A stylish road-horror with political bite as well as, like, loads of actual bites, you can forgive it its foibles for its refreshingly un-perfumed approach to those pesky bloodsucking types.

It’s time to don the corpse paint and bullet belts, because Adult Swim’s Metalocalypse is back to wreak Deth and commercialised destruction upon the masses – and Season 3 promises to be just as totally freakin’ brutal as the first two instalments.

Mars Needs Moms.The title says it all, really. Convoluted premise and poor script aside though, the worst part really needs to be seen to be believed as Robert Zemeckis and ImageMovers once again attempt to render non-repellent humanoid characters to screen…

Oh, Russell. You’re very lovely, we’ve known that for many years, but when will you stop playing the embarrassingly over-privileged cheeky chappy with a history of raucous and debauched behaviour – all pretty method – and actually do something worth watching? Arthur is elaborate, sparkly, charming and ultimately pointless, like an ornamental unicorn goad carved from a huge rock crystal by blind nuns. Exactly like that.

Director Wes Craven and writer Kevin Williamson bring together a cast of new and returning faces for one more stab at the post-modern Scream franchise. With an abundance of recent horror history ripe for the picking, they succeed beautifully in rebooting the formula while staying true to the mission statement that started it all.

Indie film maker and ‘Mumblecore’ architect Aaron Katz is back with Cold Weather, another low-budget project involving a cast of attractive 20-something unknowns. But what promises to be a modern day Sherlock Holmes-style mystery sadly turns out to be a fairly dull and aimless character study which never really gets going.

Imagine a scenario in which movie execs decided that the cast of Gossip Girl resembled something akin to actual actors…now picture an insidious conspiracy in which these cast members began to appear in actual films, based solely upon this diabolical premise of untruth. Alas, you are not the first to envision such a hideous reality – someone has beaten you to it, and The Roommate is that very nightmare.

Is anyone else getting really sick of these actually quite good US comedies that have hit the big screen recently? Does anyone think it’s about time someone put Seth Rogan and Judd Apatow in their place(s)? Well you’ll be glad to hear that writer/director duo Brad Kaaya and Craig Moss are here and they’re going to stick it to those Superbad jerks with their funny comedy in the only way they know how: toothless parody and dick jokes.