Top 10 Things From Movies You Wish You Could Get For Xmas

Remember when you were a kid and you’d spend hours writing a letter to Santa Claus pleading for your most desired wish? You would include details of everything – from the price of that special video game to the location of the action figure – nothing was left unsaid in this, the most important letter of the year. However, if like me, you were not satisfied by such mere burbles to be found in the confines of reality, you would create the ultimate list of awesome. What follows is the Top 10 Things From Movies You Wish You Could Get For Xmas!

10. ZF-1: Zorg Gun Of Doom (5th Element)

Okay. A bit of an aggressive choice to start out on a Christmas list but a multi-tool for violence needs to be somewhere on here. This bad boy made its appearance in the equally awesome Luc Besson film and impressed audiences with its vast array of potential for mayhem. Superbly introduced by Gary “Legendary” Oldman, this rifle sized population minimizer included a rocket-launcher, flame-thrower, net launcher and a replay button that sends every single bullet to the previously hit target. Take that Red Rider BB gun!

Best For: Small children, Rednecks, Facing a thousand Gary Oldmans

9. Toast Knife (Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy)

Picture this. You’re sitting somewhere alone in an unfamiliar kitchen. The walls are slick with dough, flour is spilled along the ground like blood and above you a dingy light flickers. You, knife in hand, cautiously approach your target – about to invent the greatest thing since nothing. When all of a sudden…ZzzzzZZzzzzZZZzz…you look down and your bread is not only sliced *gasp* but toasted. A highly unlikely situation but you probably get how awesome having a toast knife would be.

Best For: Girlfriends, Distant relatives, Mini Darth Vader

8. Schwarz Ring (SpaceBalls)

Don’t let the illusion of simplicity fool you if you’re unfamiliar with this device. The Schwarz Ring is more powerful than it looks – even though you might find it in a gumball machine.

See?! My God man look at the size of his Schwarz. Of course not the most practical of devices but then again Spaceballs fell far short of practical once troopers began combing the desert.

Best For: People who name their genitalia

7. Big-Ass Piano Keyboard (Big)

Let’s face it. The scene where Tom Hanks and Robert Loggia play chopsticks on the huge keyboard was epic. Again it’s something that might be impractical but imagine having it in your hallway – skipping merrily toward the kitchen idly playing “Swinging On A Star” with your feet. Unfortunately I’m fairly certain this device would become the most annoying thing to have in a house besides “anti-shin” coffee tables and probably a lot more painful if your crazy cat got stuck running from one end to the other in an endless loop screeching notes.

Best for: People who can actually play the piano, Willy Wonka, The deaf

6. Microwave (Back to The Future II)

Now here we have something practical. This awesome microwave turned a tiny pizza into the real deal with the push of a button. No more reading unimaginative cooking instructions or burnt tastiness. All the delicious glory of pizza only a zap away – which incidentally should have been here by now.

Curse you Doc for giving an entire generation unreasonable hopes for the future!

Best For: Anyone who enjoys pizza

5. Batsuit (The Dark Knight)

Nobody, and I mean nobody, can deny that they have always dreamt of owning a Batsuit. Especially given the Nolan reinvention of its technology. This midnight rat suit encompasses everything you would want in a costume including gauntlets that launch ninja like throwing stars, a sonar system and best of all a cape that you could use to glide from roof to roof. Undeniably one of the coolest things film has ever presented us with.

Best For: Billionaire vigilantes, People who need something to wear to an interview

4. Neuralizer (MIB)

Probably one of the most ingenious devices ever conceived, the neuralizer will erase a person’s memory however much you like. Which is pretty darn cool. Imagine an awkward date being completely superfluous in the wake of a red flash. You could turn it into a game – take the person in question out and act like an utter tool, then neuralize everyone in the vicinity and do it all again…

…much like the above demonstration.

Best For: Terrible dates, Faking anything

3. Batmobile (Batman Begins & Dark Knight)

The Batmobile is just straightforward gold. It has armour, guns and an afterburner. Now tell me that isn’t a combination full of joy. This is also a particularly special case because this vehicle actually exists, minus the guns that is. For $250,000 you could be racing around town down streets far too narrow, scaring bystanders as you engage the rocket poking out the back. What better way to signal the onset of the holiday season?!

Best For: People who unwillingly drive Hummers

2. Lightsaber (Star Wars)

Coming in at a very respectable 2nd place is the almighty Lightsaber. Born of the far away galaxy of George Lucas’ mind, this elegant fantasy weapon has become the holy grail for sci-fi fans around the world. Resplendent in various colours, capable of cutting through through anything like a hot knife and overall 11/10 for how cool it looks when being waved around furiously. The Lightsaber is definitely one of the ultimate Christmas wishes. If you’re still not convinced, here is a picture of Batman using one to fight a Great White shark…

Convinced? I thought so.

Best For: Dealing with the Sith, Being more badass than humanly/Batmanly possible

And coming in at number 1…

Hover board (Back to The Future II&III)

The microwave is one thing, but the Hoverboard is something completely in a league of its own. Thousands upon thousands of children saw this device and thought: “I will launch a full-scale attack on Santa and the North Pole if there is any remote chance I can get one”. At least that’s what I was thinking. The all mighty glory it represents is easily understood when picturing yourself floating through the streets without a care in the world – silently mocking those having to use their feet. If I found a genie, I’d wish for three of these!

So there you have it! The Top 10 things from movies you wish you could get this year for Christmas if there wasn’t such a finicky thing like reality. If you think something is missing from the list, feel free to share your ultimate movie dream gift!

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