Foul-mouthed and gleefully violent, Perrier’s Bounty is an edgy black comedy about one man’s turbulent journey through the lawless streets of Dublin. Scripted by award-winning playwright Mark O’Rowe (Intermission, Boy A) and punctuated with scenes of torture, Ian Fitzgibbon’s film is not for the faint of heart or easily offended. Animal lovers will certainly have to avert their eyes when a pair of beloved dogs suffer an inglorious fate at the hands of the eponymous gangster.

Hong Kong legend Jackie Chan may be comfortably in his fifties, but he still manages to put many of the action genre’s young pretenders to shame with his acrobatics in The Spy Next Door. Targeted at families, Brian Levant’s high-tech comedy marries the martial arts prowess of the leading man with slapstick and cartoon violence.

Paul Greengrass’s The Green Zone centres on one of the fundemental questions surrounding the Iraq war – When American and British forces withdraw completely from Iraq – a military strategy which seems unthinkable seven years into the campaign – will the lasting legacy be peace and democracy? Or will it will be a deep-rooted suspicion that the infamous weapons of mass destruction, the supposed justification for the invasion, never existed? It’s an interesting question, though the answers behind it are perhaps just a little too easy.

After the gross exercise in smug self-indulgence that was Kill Bill and the sadly inconsequential tackiness of Death Proof, Quentin Tarantino looks to be back on form in the utterly demented joy that is Inglourious Basterds.

After the horrible failure of Madonna’s directorial debut (she had a directorial debut? We know, we missed it too), it seems that the queen of pop is ready to give it another try. The story she’s got her eye on is that of Wallis Simpson; the American socialite whom King Edward VIII abdicated the throne for in the 1930s. She has been described as both a “greedy snob” and a “sexual predator”.

There’s a lot to worry about when it comes to the delicate, supple young minds of our children. But rather than bubblewrapping the family computer and locking the shed, maybe we should look a bit deeper into what kids films tell our children about life. We’ve examined (in great, hasty detail) the classic films kids love to watch and we must say, the results are urine-inducing…

Presumably, you only went along to the first Night at the Museum to keep the kids quiet for a couple of hours, but you might have found yourself pleasantly surprised. Not so this sequel, with its muddled plot, tired-looking effects and idiotic slapstick humour. Amy Adams, as a gleeful Amelia Earhart, and Hank Azaria, as an evil pharaoh, provide brief moments of entertainment. But they’re not enough to save this shameless commercial cash-in from languishing in the sequel bad place.

Jack Black and Michael Cera go through the motions in this pre-historic comedy. The touch of producer Judd Apatow is clear to see, but sadly this film lacks the magic of his classics such as The 40 Year Old Virgin or Knocked Up. Instead, we are treated to an hour and a half of poo jokes, Jack Black’s comedy faces and a rambling trip around the bible. We deserve better than this.

Terry Gilliam’s nonsensical fantasy is a stunning sight to behold, but the spectre of Heath Ledger’s death during filming, and his below-par performance, is a hard thing to escape.