Bloody Mary. Bloody Mary. Bloody Mary.

Ever since we watched the new Three Musketeers film we’ve wanted to drink ourselves to death. That’s not a sensation that’s likely to go away, but if there’s one thing that might fix it it’s a massive injection of quality swashbuckling. Drink along with us, and if you don’t shift the despair at least you can hasten that coma!

Adapted from Yazmina Reza’s play The God Of Carnage, Polanksi’s latest puts his trademark claustrophobia fetish to good use; creating a darkly comic, satisfyingly tense and brilliantly performed drama that, sadly, doesn’t quite make it to the finish line.

We couldn’t think of anyone better for a psycho thriller…

We haven’t been able to find out whether Bradley Cooper actually has an uncle, but he probably does.

You go, girl.

Between her and Hathaway, they’ve got all the films covered.

INSIGHT ALERT: politics can sometimes be a bit of a mucky business. There. Everyone was thinking it, but God knows it had never been articulated before George Clooney bravely blew the cobwebs off our antiquated belief that politicians are all selfless good guys working for the benefit of Joe Q. Public. The Ides of March is snappy and competent, but its hackneyed ‘message’ is dated beyond belief.

PIRANHAS! BOOBS! HASSELHOFF!

The classic, shocking and utterly unforgettable 70’s thriller Straw Dogs is finally coming to Blu-ray – and we have copies to give away! If you want to brush up on your Hoffman in time for the upcoming remake (sigh), read on…