The top-secret script for Pirates Of The Caribbean: On Stranger Tides was found left on a table in a London cafe after the film’s bosses stopped for lunch and forgot to take it with them. Luckily for them (and deeply unluckily for dastardly film schemers like us) the script was found by an avid Pirates fan (presumably the only one left), who decided not to look at the script at all.

“Mirror Mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?” It’s still Snow White of course. The infamous pasty princess of Disney is back in the 2009 digitally..

I am not afraid to say it, dear readers: I’m bored of Dickens. Not his stories, per se- she who is tired of A Christmas Carol is tired of life- but I’m bored of talking about Dickens, and Dickens’ troubled childhood in the bottle factory, and Dickens’ hilarious unsettling names for his children, and Dickens’ affairs. Frankly, dear readers, he’s just the least exciting affair-haver in Christendom. Old rich man boffs secretary. Readers appalled.

Wait, what’s that, the kids are off AGAIN? If you’re in the market for two hours of relative peace and quiet, and you’ve either never seen FernGully before or love it so much you’d happily sit through it again, then boy – then boy does Blue Sky Studios have the film for you!

Become Iron Man? Us? But we’re scared of heights!

There has been a lot of debate amongst the film community lately over Disney Pixar’s latest film venture. A film where a princess is not in love with a boy?..

Ah, Friday. It’s the end of a long week and we bet you haven’t even seen any aliens, you poor sad shmuck – well, not any that you’d remember anyway. Suspicious? WE THINK SO! Time to brush up on the alien know-how, not to mention celebrate the release of Men In Black 3, with our very own memory deletion device – alcohol.

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If asked to name successful film franchises, you could more than likely rattle off a few that have held audience interests long enough to exceed the standard trilogy. James Bond. Harry Potter. Star Wars. Heck, even Resident Evil is still putting bums on seats after four instalments. But not all film franchises continue to pull in the crowds, instead defaulting to DVD as they continue to explore their characters, story and that crack in the floor in HMV. We’ve found seven of the saddest…

Ah, Friday. Had a long week of being a grown-up and slogging your guts out at the office, wearing varying shades of grey or black and pretending to be happy about it? We pity you, we really do, which is why we’ve given you this alcoholic return to childhood with the vastly inappropriate Lion King drinking game. Let me hear you ROAR!