Thor is back, and the God of Thunder’s got a new gang. Lady Sif and the Warriors Three are still about, but (courtesy of the increasingly confused Marvel Cinematic Universe) Thor’s now attended by some new celestial hangers-on. Say hello to the Muse of Stilted Dialogue, the Sibyl of Utterly Predictable Action Sequences and the Demon of Irrelevant Villains, coming together to make a film so grotesquely misshapen that it’ll actually make you look forward to all the plagiarised bits. Sort of.

Terence Stamp is back, guys. And this time, the highly-revered actor (“I don’t like to do crap [films] unless I haven’t got the rent”) sports a contemptuous scowl and a hard-hearted exterior, playing a grumpy old pensioner learning to cope with his wife’s terminal illness. Song For Marion sees Stamp as you’ve never seen him before; regularly putting on the kettle and for the first time, acknowledging his 70+ age in this heart-warming tale about discovering that it’s never too late to discover who you truly are.

That sounds Thor-oughly splendid.

The Dark World just got brighter.

Fuck Asgard, we’re going to Svartalfheim; we hear the beaches are lovely this time of year.

You can always judge a film (well, nominally, at any rate) by the quality of its source material. Cherishing our cynicism as we do at BestForFilm, a film based on a line of chunky, over-muscled action figures doesn’t exactly have us pre-booking our tickets. As it turns out, our cynicism is – once again – justified.