Bringing Up Bobby, Famke Janssen’s directorial debut, is an excellent example of why some actors should stay in front of the camera. Although it’s reasonably well put-together, any attempt at drama, or comedy, or pathos comes off as aggressively soporific. You’ll spend less time watching the film than wondering if Milla Jovovich’s character is a paedophile. Flat, boring and stupid, no one need subject themselves to this rancid cinematic cheese.
Look, we’ve read the news – we know all about Run For Your Wife only taking £602 on its opening weekend, and about Danny Dyer (probably) threatening to cut the faces off everyone at the distribution company in retribution, apples’n’pears, blah. But when we finally made it to a screening, we were amazed. Forget your preconceptions – the only reason Run For Your Wife has bombed is because YOU PEOPLE AREN’T READY FOR IT.
With bigamy-centric farce Run For Your Wife, widely tipped to be 2013’s worst film, on (very limited) release this week, Danny Dyer’s star has seldom been higher… although that’s not saying much, actually. But where do you stand on the great Dyer debate – is he a cheeky cockney chappie lending some much-needed levity to British cinema, or just a dreadful tossbag who should have been drowned as a child? We haven’t decided yet.
The Lord of the Rings director Peter Jackson has been jetting round the world to meet with potential cast members of The Hobbit.
Oh dear, Danny. Got ourselves into a right pickle, haven’t we? The football factory actor has caused massive controversy in his Zoo “agony aunt” column by suggestive a heart-sick lad “cut his ex’s face, so that no-one will want her”.
Considered by many to be the last great British film of the ’90s, Human Traffic is an endearingly honest depiction of a weekend in the lives of five pill-popping twentysomethings. Credited with launching the careers of John Simm (Life on Mars) and much-maligned ‘mockney’ Danny Dyer, Human Traffic manages to capture the zeitgeist of the rave scene to perfection.
A small-time crook is given a week to rustle up the money he owes to a serious big fish, or else his loved one gets it. It’s not exactly a premise of shocking originality, but Dead Man Running is a perfectly enjoyable beat-em-up ask-em-later romp that will satisfy those just looking for a bit of fun, innit gunva.
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