Tom Cruise on track to star in all sci-fi movies ever, even the ones that have already been made

There’s going to be a Fifty Shades Of Grey film. We all KNOW this. We can’t, despite everything we’ve tried, stop it from happening. So, if it must happen, let’s talk casting – anyone else fancy Charlie Sheen for the role of Christian Grey? Here are our top 10 casting choices for the BDSM bonkbuster…

In light of the TomKatMobile crashing and burning on the love highway, we’ve put together a list of our Top Ten Divorce Movies.

Tom Cruise falls short of living up to the character of Jack Reacher

Xenu! Libel! XENU!

Hey, you know that saying about the eyes being the window to your soul? What if the window opened up into a nightmare, wrapped in a murder, nestled in an insane asylum? Don’t understand? You will, my friend, oh you will.

If* we ever build a time machine, Adam, we’re going back to 1966 to kick your mum in the stomach. *When

Adam Sandler stars in this gritty family drama from Dennis Dugan, which follows in the footsteps of 2011’s Tyrannosaur and We Need to Talk About Kevin in its exploration of the dark complexities of human nature. By turns shocking and deeply poignant, Jack and Jill‘s unflinching examination of the relationship between a pair of twins is often unpalatable and frequ – HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. This film is unreal.

STOP PRESS: Michelle Williams is fabulous in My Week with Marilyn. As she is is literally everything else she’s ever made, ever. By rights, you should know her blood type and preferred cut of underwear by now – and if you don’t, then why are you lingering here and not ploughing straight into this Cheat Sheet? Go! Go!

Easy for the title to say. Prepare to be mildly unsettled by Guillermo del Toro’s latest darkened fairytale, featuring our old childhood chums, the toothfairies. Except it seems they’ve up-sized to devouring whole children…