Haywire is a funny little thing, a strange mix of gritty action, suave loitering and lots and lots of running. Star Gina Carano is supremely believable as Woman Who Will Kill Everyone, but she never seems quite at home amongst Soderbergh’s splashy cymbals and stylish basslines. At the end of the day, just as Statham will never be Bond, Carano just doesn’t suit the slick-suited world of pseudo-spying – just let her loose in Dublin with a baseball bat and a score to settle next time, eh?

A bleak look at the unravelling life of a New York sex addict, Shame showcases brave work by director Steve McQueen and his second time collaborator, Michael Fassbender. Expertly shot and powerfully acted, the film takes an affliction often the subject of ridicule and uses it to tell an affecting story of vice and isolation.

January’s crap. But London’s good, isn’t it? And films are ACE. What better way to cope with January than by seeing loads of films in London? Exactly. Fortunately, there are loads of people who really, really want you to do this – so much so that they’re doing, like, festivals and everything! Suddenly January’s not so bad aft- oh god, it’s raining again.

KILL THEM, GINA! KILL THEM WITH YOUR FISTS!

In space, no-one can hear you ask what the hell is going on

STONEY-FACE IS BACK!

As 2011 draws to an end, we’re going to look forward to the top 10 films of January 2012. From gritty dramas to spectacular sci-fi flicks, there truly is something for everyone in this collection. Plus, what with the London Olympics and the end of the world due shortly, we figured it was best to try and be optimistic about our futures…

RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAURGHRUHG *flails ineffectually with tiny arms*

SO MUCH FAMOUS

Is that an Oscar-nomination in your pocket, or…