Wes Craven resurrects his knifey horror after its 11 year (yes, you’re that old) absence.

There’s nothing like new blood to pump some life into a dying franchise, and no-one knows that better than the people over at Dimension Films. To brighten up the tired old Scream series director Wes Craven is hiring a lot of nubile young things to murder in colourful ways. So who’s on board?

“One, two, Freddy’s coming for you… Three, four, better lock your door…” In 1984, writer-director Wes Craven unleashed one of cinema’s most iconic and dearly beloved boogiemen: Freddy Krueger. Dressed in an eye-catching red and green striped sweater and a beaten fedora, Freddy stalked his victims in their dreams, killing them with a glove of razor sharp knives. Craven officially laid his hideously-disfigured creation to rest in 1994 with the self-referential New Nightmare and now, more than 15 years later, Freddy is resurrected in a slick yet soulless remake that doesn’t have a clue how to scare an audience.

After a wobbly start and a second episode so distressing we didn’t even write a blog about it, Sherlock finally gave the fans (apart from those it’s-all-about-the-brolance twerps on Tumblr) what they wanted with last night’s barnstorming episode. We trot across the big/small screen divide to look at some other third instalments that have restored faith in their respective franchises.

Best For Film’s newest writer Carl Anka demolishes his BFF cherry with an essay on why film comedy has never been, and will never be, as good as it was in the 1980s. Contains borderline-diabetic levels of John Candy.

Sometimes, it’s not enough to be a talented filmmaker. You don’t want to be making adventure films with a name like Spector Whussypants, and in that logic (however flimsy it is), you wouldn’t make a horror film with a non-scary name. In fact, sometimes, the scariest thing about a horror film is the name of the filmmaker. Hold on to your butt, because here are the top 10 horror directors’ names.

To The Wonder is out now, and among the cast of Terence Malick’s newest impenetrable drama is a certain Canadian with a great big forehead and a great big heart. But will Rachel McAdams’ role be an inspired return to form for 2004’s Hollywood It Girl or a sad little footnote to a fading career? We don’t know, obviously, so we’re just having an argument.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a horror movie with a domestic gross amounting to a small fortune must be in line for a string of sequels of ever-diminishing quality. Almost all of them are terrible, being licenses to print money and all. But every now and then, by some strange alchemy, one of them.. isn’t. Here are five of our favorites, and one that we’re clearly over thinking.

The witching hour approaches and the fire is burning low, dear friends. So gather close and listen we list some of the greatest Halloween classics to… what? Made them up? Of course not! All of these are one hundred percent genuine films. If by genuine you mean that they came to us in a dream and we wrote them down and crudely edited some images. In that case they totally are.

So, The Inbetweeners Movie is finally upon us, relishing in the antics of four teenage boys on holiday. And, what with the success of Twilight and High School Musical lingering in the air like a bad smell, it seems the world has gone crazy for teen flicks. Crazy, obviously, because these new-fangled teen movies can’t ever hold a candle to the likes of Ferris Bueller and The Lost Boys. Join us as we count down our fave ever pubescent movies of all time…