In an entirely logical scenario, the name of the film which has hitherto been snappily non-titled as Untitled Mission: Impossible Reboot has finally been revealed to be: Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol. Or should that be “has finally been revealed to be… Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol“? Or maybe “has finally been revealed to be:- Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol“? You don’t see that odd penis-shaped punctuation thing much any more.

Somewhere along the line, a bigwig at Paramount picked up an insidious whisper to the effect that excessive titular punctuation would be a reasonable replacement for any actual acting talent from Cruise (pictured here fleeing from Xenu). He may no longer have floppy 90s hair, but hopefully he can continue to blow things up and hang from wires in a charmingly illicit fashion. In any event, Ghost -:%*\~ Protocol is hardly going to stand up to our favourite over-punctuated film title of all time – Roman Polanski’s The Fearless Vampire Killers, Or: Pardon Me, But Your Teeth Are in My Neck. Classic.