Abracadabra! Leterrier loses one star but gains another…

THERE AREN’T ANY PARTS LEFT, BAZ. STOP CASTING PEOPLE WHEN THERE AREN’T ANY PARTS LEFT.

Great Ga’hoole!

Woe.

If you thought that feathered mariachi bands, chameleons facing Hamlet-esque existential crises, and Pirates of the Caribbean were, in and of themselves, essentially ridiculous, farcical concepts, you’d be absolutely right. Now throw these entirely unrelated absurdities together to create one great, big, superlative mash-up of ridiculousness, and you get Rango.

And for some equally and befittingly bizarre reason, it works.

How do you know what you’re going to see at the cinema next month? You’re busy people – Facebook won’t update itself, and you’ve probably got a relationship to neglect or something. Oh, you haven’t? Sorry. Well, there’s no point in trying to meet another human adult now, you may as well just read this blog.

Vince Vaughn used to be a comedy god- up there with Ben Stiller, more marketable than Will Ferrell, less cheesy than Owen Wilson. But lately, we have realised that he is less comedy hits, more comedy misses and much less likeable on screen. Whatever has happened to everyone’s favourite funny man? We look at the rise and oh so calamitous fall of this fast talking, wedding crashing comedy supremo.

How often have you been left cringing by a truly toe-curlingly, brain-numbingly, mind-bendingly offensive accent? At least 10 times so say we. Whether you’re Scottish, Irish, Welsh or English, prepare for a nostalgia-fest of infuriating proportions.

Based on the infamous Burke And Hare murders of 1827, Simon Pegg and Andy Serkis provide a darkly silly romp through Edinburgh town aided by every British celebrity you can think of. Go on, think of one. Was it Michael Winner, or Paul Whitehouse? It doesn’t matter, they’re both in there. Though it doesn’t have the cult brilliance of Shaun Of The Dead or the gloriously bizarre sting of The League Of Gentlemen, it’s nevertheless gorily enjoyable stuff and if nothing else, it’s lovely to see Jessica Hynes (neé Stevenson) back on our screens. Not so much good writing as canny use of cameos, Burke and Hare will nevertheless just about satisfy most comedy-loving Brits. After all, who doesn’t love seeing Ronnie Corbett in a funny hat, eh?

Sacha Baron Cohen (of Ali G, Borat and Bruno fame) and actress Isla Fisher announced that they wed last Monday in a small ceremony in Paris. The couple have been together a goodly while now, with Isla even converting to Judaism in 2007 for the eclectic funnyman after studying for three years. They have a two year old daughter, and felt it was time to finally tie the knot.