Can you hear the people sing, singing a song of miserable men? We’re not too miserable this week, but we are juicy – juicy with orange juice! And lemon juice! And this doesn’t really make sense, does it? No matter, there’s a load of new films out and you can see them for half price if you have a friend! Oh, do you not? Sorry.

Few actors in Hollywood are hotter than Hugh Jackman is at the moment. He first scorched us back in 2009 when he fronted the Academy Awards, a performance that included one of the most spectacular opening numbers in Oscar history. With his much lauded performance in Les Misérables currently in the cinemas, and Jackman having just bagged a Golden Globe, we’ve prepared a cheat sheet with everything you wanted to know about Hollywood’s leading man.

Over 60 million people have watched the stage show of Les Mis, so with its release on the silver screen and 8 Oscar nominations, a lot of people are going to be wanting to celebrate. We’ve helped you out by compiling a drinking game fit to leave you feeling slaughtered at the barricades. Proceed with caution, and drink until you’re so pissed that when Jean Valjean says “Who am I?” you snort, throw up on yourself and hit him.

It’s happening right now! Our haphazardly maintained Oscars liveblog is bringing you all the news on this year’s nominations, as it happens. Just refresh for the latest info… and if you don’t like the results then remember that Shame got no nominations last year and Transformers: Dark of the Moon got 3. It’s all nonsense, but it’s exciting nonsense.

A new year, a new team of BFF word-wranglers and all we can think to do with them is write the same blog we’ve written literally ninety-six times before. Can’t work out how to kill time for the next two days until Les Mis comes out? We’re here for you.

The blonde bombshell we love to hate, Naomi Watts has popped into our lives recently by being nominated for a Best Actress Golden Globe for her performance in The Impossible. She also plays Princess Diana in the upcoming film Diana, to be released later this year. But her empty eyes don’t tell her full, heroin-dappled story – Naomi does have a few skeletons hiding in her closet!

East London’s premiere cinematic nightspot Rich Mix and documentary magicians DocHouse present another one-of-a-kind screening – this time of pioneering Czech film Solar Eclipse. Feeling like you’ll never see the sun again? You need this film in your life.

“It can be a lot of fun, but it’s not a game.” Twenty-first century sage Jim’s Dad speaks for us all; but is he talking about the time-honoured traditions of self-abuse, or the oeuvre of JRR Tolkien as projected through the slightly smeary lens of Peter Jackson? Our newest writer Will Donovan is risking the wrath of ten million Bilbo fanboys as he explains why our latest trip into Middle-Earth has more than a little in common with that time your mum caught you balls-deep in a microwaved watermelon.

This is it – the end of the single most laborious series of blogs we have ever bloody produced. Dying to find out who made the grade for our Top 12 cinematic drummers? They’re all here, and whoever you’re thinking of is definitely among them (turns out nobody really likes drummers). Merry Christmas, and see you same time next year!

Pipers piping! Eleven of the buggers! We’ve had to get a little creative with this one. Along with a few lovely lady Pipers, we’re also celebrating the Christmassy goodness stuffed into Nicolas Cage’s lucky crackpipe, one of the various instruments of death found in the House of Wax, and an escape route Tim Robbins would probably like to forget. LET’S GET PIPING.