A lo-fi gross-out horror without charm, wit or scares, Eaters: Rise Of The Dead does at least achieve one accolade: making partaking in a Nazi-zombie invasion seem preferable to watching a lo-fi gross out horror without charm, wit or scares.

Much more exciting than The Princess of Montpensier but somewhat less digestible than The Tudors, Henry of Navarre is another one of those films where men charge around on horseback/wave swords/wave swords from horseback and women take their clothes off more than is strictly necessary. If that’s your bag, it’s pretty darn fine.

DC obviously think that Ryan Reynolds’ muscles are enough on their own to deliver a bruising punch to Marvel; but the rest of Green Lantern isn’t as finely toned. It’s everything you expect from a superhero movie, but absolutely nothing more. And it nicked its colour scheme from The Mask!

Five strangers wake up in a mysterious room, with just a ticking clock and enough water to survive for 30 days. It may sound like another Saw rip-off, but despite its flaws Hunger is an unexpected treat.

In this note-perfect take on Italian/US exploitation cinema, a hobo vigilante blows away crooked cops, pedophile Santas and gang overloads with his trusty pump-action shotgun. He lives on the streets. It’s time to clean them up…

Centring on an underwater cave exploration gone wrong, Sanctum mixes real-life events of writer Andrew Wight with the words “EXECUTIVE PRODUCED BY JAMES CAMERON”. It’s not quite The Descent, it’s not quite The Abyss, it’s not quite worth the money you’d pay for it.

DISCLAIMER: This film is A Film About Animals on Farms. If you’re a young girl, and you still think being a vet involves magically making animals better all the time, you’ll love it (and I hope your parents are strictly monitoring your internet use). Everyone else: avoid All Roads Lead Home. Avoid it like it’s a sow coughing loudly circa 2009.

In February of 1976 Francis Ford Coppola and his American Zoetrope production team began filming Apocalypse Now. Approximately 3 years later and reportedly some $30 million over budget the film premiered at the Cannes festival to wide critical acclaim. Now, some 30 years down the line the Vietnam epic has been lovingly restored by Coppola’s own production company and is back on the big screen. It should go without saying that for a generation of cinephiles this presents an opportunity not to be missed.

Ghosted is another reliable, by-the-numbers and relatively unmemorable British prison drama. Why do we keep making them? Presumably because people lap them up – and if prison-drama-up-lapping is your bag, this’ll do you just fine.

A straight-to-DVD prize, where perinatal horror and unnaturally large nipples eclipse murder, paranoia and preternatural possession into insignificant mundanity. There’s little else to say, really, except to ask if we really needed another reason to fear the gory joys of pregnancy?