There’s generally only one type of Christmas film, or at the very least, a very identifiable type of film that always seems to get a festive release, year after year…

It’s been left up to Disney to challenge our hackneyed beliefs by presenting us with a bunch of spies that take the form of… wait for it, you’ll love it… Guinea pigs! Yeah, those infanticidal, hooting, air-sniffing pigs. As spies. It’s a one-note joke that’s taken to the extreme – Pixar would’ve made an idea like that into a witty ten minute short. Here, it’s 90 minutes long, and generally one ninth as entertaining, too.

There’s a lot to worry about when it comes to the delicate, supple young minds of our children. But rather than bubblewrapping the family computer and locking the shed, maybe we should look a bit deeper into what kids films tell our children about life. We’ve examined (in great, hasty detail) the classic films kids love to watch and we must say, the results are urine-inducing…

Tinkerbell has managed to get herself some good press in the last couple of years. As far as we remember, Tinkerbell was that tiny, bad tempered cow who basically tried..

There are rumors floating around that the sexiest pirate on earth Jack Sparrow, will be making a return to our screens in a fourth instalment of Pirates of the Caribbean…

“Mirror Mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?” It’s still Snow White of course. The infamous pasty princess of Disney is back in the 2009 digitally..

A pentagon scrawled in still-warm blood drips on the wall of an abandoned cathedral; demonic prayers are heard as chilling whispers in the night as the Dark Lord is praised. What we feared has come to pass: The Satan Buddies have returned. Oh, wait a mo…

An action packed yet rather fluffy CGI-romp from Dreamworks. Aliens are attacking, and the only ones who can beat them are monsters imprisoned by the government. For the wee ones, the in-jokes, great graphics and cameo appearances will be enough to satisfy, but if you’re looking for something with a bit more heart, we’d recommend the meatier offerings from Disney/Pixar.

Call us crazy, but we thought Christmas was the time for good cheer? There’s not much to be cheerful about in this dark adaptation of the Dickens classic. With pacey action and good performances there is still something to enjoy, but if we’re honest, at Christmas we just want to leave the cinema with sleighbells in our ears and a smile on our faces.

Whether you’re a wee nipper like Monsters inc’s Boo, or more a Up star Mr Frederickson, there’s a Disney-Pixar film for you to fall in love with. The real question now is, how would you fare in your own Pixar tale? We’ve got the How-To guide for any budding hero or heroine. Grab your plucky sidekick, sniff out the nearest peril, and join us…