The Saw films have turned wanton cruelty into an annual event, with a seventh instalment in the series due this Halloween. Marcus Dunstan and Patrick Melton, screenwriters of Saw IV, V and VI, evidently aren’t satisfied with the carnage they have already wrought, so they have co-written this equally grisly tale about a robbery that turns unexpectedly nasty.

Get Him To The Greek foolishly promotes a supporting player – Russell Brand’s egotistical rock star Aldous Snow from the 2008 relationship comedy Forgetting Sarah Marshall – to centre stage in his own film. You can have too much of a good thing and we have our fill of Aldous’s sexist outbursts well before the first hour.

The upcoming film based on the life and times of Mark Zuckerberg – creator of Facebook – has released it’s first teaser trailer. And it certainly is a little tease, as there are effectively no visuals whatsoever, just a series of small soundbites from the movie. Little minxes.

OK, we admit, news is fairly thin on the ground today, but for those who thought Meet The Fockers was just freaking hilarious and not at all crap and tired, good news! There’s a trailer out for the even more funny and not at all tired and crap sequel: Little Fockers! Fockers, do you get it? Yeah, cos… oh you remember that joke from the first two films? Oh yeah.

Every time we’re almost sure we’re stuffed full of Scott Pilgrim awesome, another sumptuous dish turns up and we can’t possibly turn it away. This time around, it’s the trailer for the playstation game accompanying the film, and by the staff of Moses it looks glorious.

Director Clint Eastwood has done it again with Invictus, a wonderfully uplifting film that follows the true story of Nelson Mandela’s quest to reuinte his fractured country through the peaceful bonds of of giant men bashing into each other.

A British re-make of a black French comedy, Wild Target is a film that, sadly, never quite hits the bullseye. Bill Nighy, Rupert Grint, Rupert Everett, Martin Freeman and Emily Blunt all lent their hands to this crime caper, with a script never quite lives up to the talent around it. Despite its stellar cast and romping pace, the team are let down by bad jokes, sloppy storytelling and cliche characters.

Now that he’s hung up his pointy hat, wand and pained-yet-heroic expression for good, we’re all wondering what Daniel Radcliffe will do next. He’s finished filming the seven book/eight film epic that is Harry Potter, and hasn’t wasted much time in selecting a new role. He’s announced that he will be starring in a remake of the 1930s WW1 epic All Quiet On The Western Front.

… And it seems pretty for real this time around. Orlando Bloom and partner Miranda Kerr have been dating now for three years, and their loved-up general cosiness has sparked many a wedding rumour in the past. But according to Bloom’s representative “Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr are getting married”. And, well, there’s not a lot of misinterpreting that, is there?

Well, it’s certainly news that will cause shockwaves to run through the very heart of acting institutions everywhere. Amanda Bynes has announced that at 24 she has retired from acting, as “(she doesn’t) love it anymore.”