It’s been reported today that Sigourney Weaver is set to star alongside Alicia Silverstone and Krysten Ritter (of Confessions of Shopaholic non-fame) in a new modern twist on the vampire flick. The film will tell the tale of happy young vampire girls, happily chewing their way through innocent men everywhere.

After the world-domination success of the High School Musical trilogy, it’s only natural that the big dogs at Disney attempt a movie to fill the gaping gap in the tween market. And what have we learnt from High School Musical? Kids like High Schools. Kids like Dancing. Kids like other kids looking really fancy. Cue, Prom.

“Boy meets girl. Boy falls in love. Girl doesn’t.” Marc Webb’s 500 Days of Summer is refreshing because as its tag-line suggests, it tells the truth about love. Sometimes things just don’t work out. Simple. And that’s fine.

Bill Bailey goes all-out musical in this new DVD, recruiting the entire Albert Hall symphony orchestra to assist him in his mad, amusing rambles. Taking a tour of the entire orchestra, Bailey drags in everything from the sound of trombones, jellyfish, the Doctor Who theme tune, Bach and Motzart. It’s a huge show – easily Bailey’s biggest – and while his trademark wit and surrealism still sparkle, the massive repetition of material sadly bogs down this release.

Once you find what it is you’re good at then just go with that, right? There’s no need to try your hand at anything else. Take the warblers and crooners for example; mainly the ones that sing about love, relationships and all that romantic crap. They should just stick to their day jobs. There’s absolutely no need for them to attempt a career in acting because quite frankly, it’s embarrassing for everyone.

Chance Pe Chance is Bollywood’s answer to School of Rock…kind of. Struggling actor Sameer (Shahid Kapoor) works several jobs to keep on top of life’s expenses but soon realises that..

A million balloons, a flying house and a talking dog. Disney and Pixar team up once again to bring us yet another graphically and visually dazzling animation. Showing both in 2D and 3D, it’s the cocktail of action, adventure and comedy with an added shot of good morals we can normally expect from this prosperous pairing.

Take a romatically challenged, cynical workaholic and cross her with a victim of heartbreak who thinks with what’s in his pants. What do you get? True love apparently. Boy meets girl. Girl hates boy. Boy wins girl over. It’s nothing we’ve never seen before – The Ugly Truth is your typical boring battle of the sexes ‘romantic comedy’. Yet another sickly film to leave us with a floating outlook on relationships. And that’s the ugly truth.

It’s sad when your realise something you used to find endless entertainment in as a child is no longer appealing to you. Much like discovering we would rather play drinking games than jump rope, it seems the time has come where we may have outgrown the Chipmunks. Either that or this modern-day retelling of the rodents’ rise to fame in the music industry was, well, crap.

You don’t need us to tell you this was never going to be a good film, but in the age of Up and Where the Wild Things Are, there’s always a chance kids’ movies might surprise you. No surprises here unfortunately – this sequel to the equally inane Alvin and the Chipmunks sees our high-pitched protagonists dealing with high school and a rival rodent-based pop group with typical stupidity and slapstick humour. The plot is formulaic, there’s no acting to speak of and there’s enough cutesyness to test even the strongest stomach.