‘Most people we’d like to boff (and Scarlett Johansson) in one scene’?
You’ve all seen Marvel Avengers Assemble by now, right? Well, we have some theories about that mysterious fellow who showed up at the end. Massive spoiler warnings from hereonin, obviously, but if you’re wondering why people keep saying things like ‘Thanos’, ‘Infinity Gauntlet’ and ‘destroying half of all the living creatures in existence’ then you’d better read on…
The wait is finally over! After no fewer than four stand-alone prequels, the giants of Marvel’s metahuman stable explode onto the silver screen in a joyous orgy of action, wit and great big hammers. Visionary director Joss Whedon pulls off the ultimate balancing act as Earth’s Mightiest Heroes™ settle their differences for one of the most exhilarating superhero films ever.
Your brain is gearing up for another week of think-filth, so who can blame you for spending your final hours of freedom gawping cheerily into nothingness? There are BRAND NEW films out this week, and all of them have splendid, noisy trailers. Stop trying to read anything, leave the washing-up where it is and promise yourself you’ll definitely change your sheets in an hour or so – WATCHING TRAILERS IS NOW!
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