The One Direction film – otherwise known as One Direction: This Is Us – is officially out in cinemas! Directed by Morgan ‘Supersize Me’ Spurlock and charting the boys’ meteoric rise to fame from their humble beginnings as mere children, the film looks set to break box office records and the hearts of perma-sobbing tweens everywhere.
Please, Penélope, use protection. Bond looks as though he’s a repository for every sexually-communicable disease out there.
SET PHASERS TO oh just shut up John don’t even bother.
With this summer set for forty days and forty nights of rain, us BFFers are gettin’ outta here! Or not. Because let’s face it, where would you be without our continual filmic drivel to keep you entertained during these darkened days? No, instead we’re humouring ourselves with a virtual trip that will take us to sun-soaked exotic places without leaving the comforts of our rather comfy office. So get your flight socks on and your mozzie spray out, ‘cos we’re going round the world in eight holiday-based films!
With a few exceptions, taglines are used to sell movies that nobody wants to buy. Noticing that Hollywood have assigned some classic taglines to the wrong movies, we crack out the red pen and make with the corrections.
With the help of an inside source, I aim to expose of truth behind these glamorous events and discover what goes on behind the scenes.
Despite the recent success of Sex And The City 2, it seems that it isn’t all stumbling around the Sahara desert and sipping cocktails for Kim Cattrall. The fifty-three year old is to receive an honorary fellowship from Liverpool John Moores University for her outstanding and sustained contribution to the dramatic arts.
We all know by now that the new Sex And The City film hasn’t exactly reached the dizzying heights of success the ladies are used to. In fact, it seems more like the only thing keeping Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and Samantha from falling face-down into the shit-storm of media hate is their glistening high heels. Judging by the reviews so far it seems like it’s not only boring, and patronising, but also more racist than a ticking gollywog. Brilliant stuff. Well done everyone. But what are the critics actually saying?
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