Julia, have a word.

Tom Six, Adolf zero.

So you’re drunk. You had one too many at Pizza Express or wherever, and now you’re in the cinema, and you are drunk. And you have FEELINGS. About this film. That you are watching. You may or may not swear at the screen, but whatever you say (you don’t remember in the morning) it is loud. You are swiftly removed from the cinema, and never permitted to return. Dark times. Enter Movie Interruption Screenings.

SQUASH THAT CENTIPEDE! SQUASH IT DEAD!!!

WE CAN’T WAIT (for Tom Six to stop moving)

Do you want to be repulsed? Do you want to be disgusted? Do you want to be horrified? If so, then this film is not for you. Because what The Human Centipede 2 actually is, is REALLY, REALLY DULL.

We’re as shocked as you are.

Not cool, BBFC. Not cool at all.

The release of The Skin I Live In got our minds wandering on the topic of plastic surgery. It wandered to places it probably shouldn’t have.

But… what will fill our most hideous nightmares forever now?