Argo goes platinum, and Zero Dark Thirty follows closely behind.

In honour of the release of not-actually-dreadful supernatural romance Beautiful Creatures, we’re going to spend our Friday night submerged in the murky pool of Hollywood’s latest obsession, the supernatural romance. If you start feeling funny at the sight of non-standard dentition, or you’ve ever wanted to marry someone whose hands need combing at the end of the month, you’ve come to the right place.

Sugar coated as “the new Twilight” (a preposterous decision by its PR team), Beautiful Creatures successfully manages to come out a hundred times better. I may be its key demographic (geeky girl seeks escapist fantasy) but I went in, fellow Twilight h8er, expecting the worst. I was turned. Combining likeable characters with a refusal to take itself too seriously, Beautiful Creatures is this year’s perfect Valentine’s day guilty pleasure.

From the Queen of the Desert to the King of the News Corp.

Gomez shows that young pipsqueak Biebs what he’s missing.

Guillermo del Toro, the creative genius who brought you Pan’s Labyrinth, presents Mama; a chilling horror centred on the abandonment of two young children and the haunting consequences of their years alone in the wild. In comparison to other child-horror films, Mama packs a compelling storyline that keeps the film from sinking into a terrible cliché, turning Mama from a classic ghost story into a bizarre (and suitably del Toro) concoction of manic special effects and gripping cinema.

From decapitation via samurai sword to snake attack, how many deaths has Tarantino actually caused?

Imagine Tyrion Lannister with SUPERPOWERS.

If you can get over the fact that Ralph is voiced by John C. Reilly (and not distract yourself with an internal showreel of Step Brothers), then Disney’s new 3D animation will blow your visceral senses. Set in a variety of different arcade game worlds, Wreck-It Ralph is the epitome of imagination and ingenuity; a modern classic for any kid’s shelf, especially a nostalgic adult gamers, if they can get through the sticky fudge of Disney values…

It’s unspectacular and massively spoiler-y, but we’re children inside and still excited.