Tim Hetherington, whose documentary Restrepo was nominated for an Academy Award this year, has been killed while covering the conflict in Libya.

Pooh Bear, Piglet, Tigger, Eeyore, Owl, Rabbit, Kanga, Roo and Christopher Robin return to the screen for their first canon outing in 34 years; this time they’re on the hunt for Eeyore’s lost tail, whilst trying to rescue Christopher Robin from the terrible Backson and find Tigger a friend to bounce with. And is it really so unreasonable of Pooh to want a little honey to look forward to? Prepare to haemorrhage nostalgia.

And it’s… it’s quite boring, actually.

Psst! What do you know about Marion Cotillard? Yeah, obviously she’s gorgeous – and yes, she was indeed in bloody Inception. Honestly, is that all you’ve got? It’s a worry, it really is. If we were you, we’d be on the look out for some sort of helpful sheet of facts with which you could cheat your way through a conversation about her…

The bastard.

It’s the 14th Monday since we started our quest to mash up absolutely everyone in the world with a conveniently rhyming name. Bet you didn’t expect us to last this long, did you? Neither did we, so for God’s sake have a look and validate all the wasted hours we’ve spent putting people on top of other people for no reason whatsoever.

How do you not know whether or not you own a house?

Oh, Russell. You’re very lovely, we’ve known that for many years, but when will you stop playing the embarrassingly over-privileged cheeky chappy with a history of raucous and debauched behaviour – all pretty method – and actually do something worth watching? Arthur is elaborate, sparkly, charming and ultimately pointless, like an ornamental unicorn goad carved from a huge rock crystal by blind nuns. Exactly like that.

LAD.

Warning: extreme copypasta ahead. Proceed with caution.