Come come Mr Bond, you get as much pleasure from Romance as we do.

The Rock gets a double-axe wielding maniac for a sidekick. Yeah.

.. and Mama and Identity Thief and Van Helsing and Bourne and probably your mum.

Mother’s Milk is a complicated family drama centring on the fate of a charming holiday orchard house in the south of France. Eleanor Melrose has decided to bequeath the family holiday home in Provence to an Irish shama instructor for its use as a New Age Foundation, rather than giving it to her son Patrick and his family. Over a long summer there, the film explores the relationships between the residents as Eleanor seems on the verge of death. Boringly.

Well, it’s another incredibly boring week for cinema. Surely nobody could squeeze eight hundred words of fun and frolics out of a box office that’s mostly 90s Leo, past-it Paul Rudd and absolutely any Danny Dyer at all? Well, perhaps nobody could – but four nobodies working together have got a chance. This week’s breakdown of what not to see, brought to you by the cream of BFF:

To celebrate the upcoming release of Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters, complete with Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton as a ridiculously attractive (and probably incestuous) witch-busting brother and sister duo, we’ve decided to take a look at the top 10 fairytales which DESERVE to be made into films. For the good of all of us…

Oscar nominee Jennifer Lawrence just LOVES working with David O Russell, doesn’t she?

Heroes meets Vampires.

Back away from the Twilight producers, Green.

BIG SURPRISE